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Response to Toerag's "No bugs"
| Open Poetry #4 |
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Response to Toerag's "No bugs" |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA 
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Old Toerag seem to get a kick Of picking on my job… If I'm no intellect like him Then I must be a slob. Well, I guess it is up to me To teach this boy a lesson. It's time to take a look at mister Toerag's great profession. They say that he's a teacher. Of what, I'm not quite sure. It certainly isn't English or Some form of literature. They say when he conducts his class He really has a nerve. His tests are given orally And he grades 'on the curve'. If a student's blouse is buttoned up Where he can't see her cleft, She may as well forget her grade. She's gonna get an "F". If her skirt comes up just far enough To show a dimpled knee And, perhaps a flash of nylon, then She might just get a "D". If she drops her chalk a lot And bends over from the waist, There is no doubt beside her name A "C" will then be placed. If the skirt is up and neckline down Exposing double D's, Just bet the farm and bank account Her grade will be a "B". And, for those special students Who really want that "A" And don't let anything like prudence Get up in their way They ask for help with homework And give Toerag their address They spend the night just boning up On lessons, I would guess. Then, if by early morning, They've satisfied Toerag By putting out….strong effort, then The "A" is in the bag. So, ladies, if you go to school And sit in Toerag's class To get an "A" by Toerag's rules, You better show your a….! |
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| © Copyright 1999 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Bal, you got him all wrong you know..cause Toerag is all man and likes to makes us laugh but now and then he makes us cry equally as well but one thing he would never do is ask to see my ass Cause Toerag here has way too much fine class! Great poem Bal...  HUSG ------------------ Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream... |
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Lost Dreamer Member Elite
since 1999-06-20
Posts 2464Somewhere near the Rainbow |
I knew you would not disappoint with your come back to Mr.Toe. LOL I loved it. |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
So I was good in class you know I was a student of Mr. Toe Don't know 'bout all this fuss Mr. Toe gave me an A Plus!  |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Deer Balladeer, 'tis this I know About our old friend, Raggy Toe This teacher's famous litany Is that he taught porn..... photography... |
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Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Oh, Balladeer - This is a retort at it's finest. You really have me laughing now! This one made the 'honor roll'. He'll probably make you stay after class. COVER YOUR --- ! ------------------ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ [email protected] |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Rainbow, I can't believe there are two Toerags in the world but there must be...'cause we're not talking about the same one! |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
Bal: as I switch this thing off, that's cause you don't know the darling that I do, but then you're a man and I'm the one that gave him the name TOERAG...and he's as sweet as a nut....that's why he's called Toerag! HUSG ------------------ Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream... |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
LMBO...good one Balladeer! Just remember if you drop the chalk, just LEAVE it there! Ok Toe, whatcha got? ------------------ <*\\\>< Jesus is the reason for the season |
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JTF Member
since 1999-08-09
Posts 319France |
ROFLMAO ... Great one Balladeer ... ... and Rainbow, maybe that's a male thing but I think Deer is right ... Besides, as you pointed out, Toerag is quite known for his sweet nuts *g* |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I've taken many classes, Don't need another degree - But I'd sure be enrolling (And pay whatever fee!) If every course requirement And every elective, too Were taught by that sweet Toerag... A degree? I'd stay for two! |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
The degrees are certainly piling up in here.... Geesh - I, personally, love them both Deerly - Head to Toe.... |
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Ohme Senior Member
since 1999-07-17
Posts 816Texas |
What would we do without Toerag and Balladeer? One thing is for sure. We wouldn't laugh as much! Thanks for the giggles. |
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U K Hero Member
since 1999-08-08
Posts 266England |
Ha... I do love reading the banter between you two guys, why dont you kiss and make up...no, no keep going the way you are, its more fun to read. |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
Ha! I'm sure everybody notices that I do not fling witless arrows at either of these two jesters. I leave them to their own devices, and enjoy the spoils of the pyrhhic victories. Old Deer and Toe square off with words, Their malice is plain to see. Whist I wait in the shadows, And feed the flames they breathe. I knew that bringing Toe in here, Would ignite a powder keg. No matches? Here, let me help, I'll even strike the match's head. I love ya both - I'm sorry I've been away for so long, and will be a stranger for a while longer. While you two seem worlds apart, you are truly cut from the same bolt of cloth. |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
My dearest sailor friend, I've missed you quite a bit, But your poem above is a tad bit off, Cuz the cloth remarks don't fit! Balladeer's a cut of cloth, That's the accurate part, But I'm a cut of silk so fine, He's cheesecloth from Kmart. He's definitely a "SECOND" An irregular that's not quite right, But his weave is not the usual, It's obvious in light. But he's always on the blue light special, A bargain at half the price, He's good for toilet paper, For that he does suffice! |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
(Clucking tongue with regret) Dear Toerag, you old rascal, I've been a stranger way too long. You've become irrascible, Your words are now too strong. Tis true old Balladeer our friend, May be longer in the tooth. But he deserves a better end, Than Mr. Whipple would peruse. As for your silken origin, Remember from whence your came. Silk's from a worm's suthern end, Are you saying you're the same? |
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Toerag Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622Ala bam a |
Surely you're a jester, Do ya think I'm polyester? I'm refined silk from the finest weave, And if you really don't believe? think of the negligee your "sweetie" wears, And remember I've been next to "there".... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
And then there is that sailor He's just a tiny thread Since he became unraveled At the thought of sweet Lor's bed! *G* Hiya, scalawag... good to see you and that fine silk at it again! *G* |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
ROFL...if I could talk instead of laughing I would...ROFLMAO !!!! HUGS you guys ------------------ Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream... |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
hmmpphhhh - so, ya lil Belle - just a thread am I? Sure! And the cables holding the Golden Gate Bridge are just spider webs! I am not a thread, I'm just kinda stringy and tough! Hi there, lil Queen. As for you, Mr. Scalawag Toerag, it is great reading your words again. Have you headed for warmer climes yet? |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
What fiber is he made of Our dear friend called Toerag? He's threads of 21 karat gold Woven through a burlap bag And what about the other one Mr. Balladeer? He's imported damask of the finest grade Stained with mustard and beer Liz |
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LngJhnAg Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion |
LOL - nice shot, Liz May I add another verse??? And what of that saintly sailor, The finest man of seven seas? What is the make of his cloth? He's of silver filigree. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
....stained with mustard and beer, Elizabeth? |
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Sally S. Senior Member
since 1999-06-07
Posts 847Ohio |
LOL!! I can't decide who's funniest. Shaking my head at the lot of ya!  |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
I had to make it rhyme Liz |
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RainbowGirl Member Elite
since 1999-07-31
Posts 3023United Kingdom |
I think I've finally cracked...cause I had this strange vision of Toe and 'Deer' getting married...and I, suthern, Iloveit, PdV and Nan, troopsing up the aisle as bridesMen....I can just hear the words but I dareren't repeat them because I couldn't anyway I'm laughing so much and it's all Marilyn's fault...ROFL...ooops...hope my wacky sense of humour doesn't offend..ROFLMAO!!!..hmmmm...sorry!...ROFL! Not to mention getting a degree...but one thing is for sure, you guys both get a 1st in the degree of laughter!... How to make others laugh degree: passed with excellence by Toe and Bal with HONOURS! ------------------ Yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream... [This message has been edited by RainbowGirl (edited 12-03-1999).] |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Watch out, ToeRogue..... Silk is woven by little worms, isn't it? Methinks that Bigroach may send his brigade of exterminators after them if he sees them spinnin' about........ |
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caroline Senior Member
since 1999-08-16
Posts 1218http://members.xoom.com/belladona123/index.htm |
~*ROFL*~ |
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