I hear his voice

WILL YOU TRADE FOR
WHAT IS BEHIND DOOR #3?

and Monty Hall is pointing
at the small package in my hand
and smiling
at the emerald door
almost transparent
I can see outlines
people
hear laughter...happy voices
yet confusion
helter skelter
silver rings and bracelets
beckoning....entreating me
a face with sad eyes
watching me
and I want to trade
I WANT TO TRADE!!!!
but I'm afraid
and the package
rests lightly in my hands
depending on me
counting on me
BUT I WANT TO TRADE!!!!
i scream silently
to the ghost form
dancing and spinning away
waving to me
disappearing into a white
billowy cloud
high above the earth.
COME BACK! i scream
I LOVE YOU!!!
but the audience is waiting
for an answer.

WILL YOU TRADE FOR DOOR #3?

and i scream out "I need more time!!!"
but i only have three notes
to name that tune
and the melody isn't coming
and Thor is inside my head
hammer pounding unmercifully
at my temples
his father laughing at me
and the planetarium
down the street
is calling the police
because one of the planets is missing
and Ralph Edwards is saying
"Michael, THIS is your LIFE!!!"
but i'm crying because
the pages are all blank
and the audience is laughing
and Regis is yelling at me
IS THAT YOUR FINALANSWER???
Oh, God!!!! if you're out there
help me
but You're not
heaven doesn't open doors
to sinners like me
and the only friend i can phone
is out of town and
i don't have her number.

WILL YOU TRADE FOR DOOR #3???

and door #3 is becoming
more solid
i cannot see through
and i'm screaming
WAIT! WAIT!
you're always in such a rush, girl!!!
but there's a deadbolt there and
I hear motors revving up
i'm screaming, pleading, begging!!!!
but the package is in my hands
and if i drop it
to open the door....it will shatter
and i'm lost in the sound of silence
from behind the door
and it's lost
i'm lost
begging forgiveness
for what i am not
as pink walls close in on me
and i fall
counting crows in my head
still clutching the package
i cannot let fall.

Forgive me, door #3
Forgive me,my friend.
i am SO sorry.......