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A home without a wall, |
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| How to Join | Member's Area | Private Library | Search | Sanctuary | Login | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Main Forums | Discussion | Tech Talk | Mature Content | Archives |
A home without a wall, |
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| Poetry Workshop |
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Emperiled Love |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap 
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What heart entreats, I fear I cannot be -- Nor speak the words that hope demands to hear; For such would trust my happiness to thee, And christen thee as one I must revere. Though innocent and pure thou might appear, A blessing of the heavens' lofty hand, Thine eyes endanger all I hold as dear: For I am but a slave to their demand. Upon my soul, in mastery you stand -- I cannot from my mind this sight erase -- Thine eyes burn not with love, but cold command: And naught but cruel intentions in your face! For love's facade, no favor shall I spare: There are much kinder means to court despair! ------------------ You cannot choose the way of your death, but the path you choose will determine its own end. |
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| © Copyright 1999 Linda Anderson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
Wow Skyfyre ! First class is almost silent and then you come up with this ! WOW ! [This message has been edited by Munda (edited 11-07-1999).] |
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Ohme Senior Member
since 1999-07-17
Posts 816Texas |
Me thinks you must have written other sonnets! Very pretty, Skyfyre. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Excellent job with this one  ------------------ Alis volat propriis |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
Well now - I can see as well that you aren't a novice. Your theme develops nicely - Your rhyme scheme adheres perfectly to the Spenserian mode - and - Your meter is flawless iambic pentameter... What more is there? Oh yeah - IMAGERY!! You've used personification beautifully.... All I can say is I wish I had written this one!!!  |
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Skyfyre Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906Sitting in Michael's Lap |
I must agree with Nan, I wish I had written this one ... but only for the skill exhibited, not the content. My love would be most distressed if I wrote something like this!  Writing a poem, especially a structured poem, in archaic language is quite a challenge ... you performed admirably here. The sonnet is one of my favorite forms, and you have demonstrated precisely why with this piece. Well done. Nocht |
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Sally S. Senior Member
since 1999-06-07
Posts 847Ohio |
Wow, Skye....this is terrific. What more could I add that the other's haven't already said?? Very well written. |
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