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Marley Sexton
New Member

since 2009-08-06

Posts 3

0 posted 2009-08-06 04:16 PM

Okay, I started writing poetry about a month ago, just as i started the section of my english GCSE that was to do with poetry, and i'm slowly getting better. But as i read others Poetry on various sites, i find that i seem to be missing something and they flow much better.

So anyway i've added a poem i wrote a week ago, you can be as brutly honest as you wish, maybe you could help me with my Technique, Thanks!

--
Bury me.
--
Upon my death,
Bury me please.

Bury me high,
So i Overlook the sky.

Bury me with pride,
So that i may not cry.

Bury me with a stone,
So i may be Known.

Bury me with a precession,
So my death is an accession.

Bury me in peace,
So my pain shalt cease.

Bury me with a dove,
So i may know your love.

Bury me without guilt,
So your life can be rebuilt.

Bury me a tree,
So i may be free.

Bury me Please.

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

1 posted 2009-08-06 07:45 PM

Welcome, Marley, to the site and the workshop. In the poetry workshop we do not critique other's work. We create assignments and grade on how well the assignments are done. You can choose a lesson from the many we have listed here and submit something pertaining to that lesson. If you wish a critique of your poetry, simply post it in the Open forum and request advice....by the way, you have the "do not encourage critiques" marked in your profile. You need to change that if you want critiques or advice.

We hope you enjoy your stay here