|Teen Poetry #2|
|I'm In Love|
since 2000-06-01Posts 569
Morris, Ill. U.S.A
This isn't meant to be any kind of knock or competition towards the other poem entitled the same. I read it and reccomend that you do to!!!!
I'm In Love
Making me weep, it brings me to my knees.
To hold it tight, I beg he softly to please
never make me leave.
It sends me through the finest joys and pains;
back and forth, tugging on the reigns.
I have no control.
To have control, to have the wheel
would negate the depth of wha I feel.
I'm dancing on the edge.
I want security, I need the maximum
extent of emotion inside her passion.
I'm torn between myself.
When she talks, when she's still
I need a camera. Where's the film?
Every crease, every single line
of her face, I'll capture for all time.
I never look away.
I'm in love...I'm in deep.
On my knees, I start to weep.
I pray to God, her heart I'll keep.
I'm in love with her.
Jeremy D. Halstead
|© Copyright 2000 Jeremy D. Halstead - All Rights Reserved|
since 2000-06-04Posts 147
Hilton Head, SC, USA
i really dont know, yours is pretty good, its a different style of writing, and a little different im meaning, i like it
always follow your heart, never follow others unless it is truely where you want to go, and never give up a dream, maybe just set it aside...:)
since 1999-08-25Posts 176
If that's what love feels like, I think you just explained it. This is a really sweet poem. I liked it alot. Keep up the good work.
"Poetry is the music of the souls, and above all, of great and feeling souls."
since 2000-05-31Posts 932
Yet again! Your words moved me in such a way I felt like I was in love for the very first time jumping for the feelings I foolishly wanted only to find I would get hurt. But I know that one of teses days, I'll find someone who loves me just as much as I love him and I will truly be happy...my only question is how long do I have to wait? Well, I hope you are in love! I hope you are feeling all these things and more because love is a wonderful thing...as long as it is true and not only that but mutual! Wonderful writing! Keep it up!! Love Always~*~Jessica~*~
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