This needs a title and I was hoping you guys could help me out

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Teen Poetry #2

This needs a title and I was hoping you guys could help me out

Vball Chickie1624
Member

since 2000-05-14

Posts 116
New York

0 posted 2000-05-14 05:14 PM

Streams of tears roll down my face,
And to think the reason all revolves around race.
He's black, I'm white,
One would never think people'd put up such a fight.
His family said we couldn't be together,
Not today, not tomorrow, not ever.
He says he loves me,
But obviously it just wasn't meant to be.
I've never felt so many emotions all at once,
And to think we were together for only a month.
I wish I would'vee known before I got in too deep,
I actually thought he was mine to keep.
I feel angry, sad, discriminated against, but most of all betrayed,
But still my feelins are so strong sometimes I think they'll never fade.
I trusted him with my heart,
And then watched him carelessly break it apart.
I know he didn't mean to but still I don't understand why,
If he really loved me why did he still lie?
I know with tie my heart will heal,
But until then please be gentle about how I feel.
I may be white and him black,
But no matter what his skin color I'll always love him back.

May 11th, 2000 11:44 pm

Daysleeper
Member

since 2000-04-23

Posts 119

1 posted 2000-05-14 05:39 PM

This seems to be an issue on this board now... what, between you and the dark angel. It's frustrating, racial descrimination, and sickening... the only thought there that I can possibly offer for comfort is that it IS getting better. It's getting better all the time. Just think where we were fifty years ago. Black people couldn't ride our busses, live in our neighborhoods, drink from our water fountians... We know it has to be getting better.

If only we could teach all young people, here and now, that race is irrelevant, and a person must prove themselves one way or the other, and not be judged by their ethnic origin, then I think we would be able to destroy all race-hate, once and for all.

Unfortunately parent's pass their anger onto their children, and as long as people continue to be angry it may never completely disappear.

As for a title to your poem, which is by the way very excellent and a moving narrative, I'm not certian. Some poems scream a title, but your's deals with so many different feelings, and moments that it's hard to pick a specific thread... My only suggestion for the moment is "Skin."

Keep writing.

...Daysleeper...

"We prefer to do things comfortably" said the Controller.
"But I don't want comfort. I want God, I want poetry, I want real danger, I want freedom, I want goodness. I want sin."
"In fact," said Mustapha Mond, "you're claiming the right to be unhappy."
"Alright then," said the Savage defiantly, "I'm claiming the right to be unhappy." -Aldous Huxley "Brave New World"

Lucius Cade
Member

since 2000-03-23

Posts 235
Saskatchewan

2 posted 2000-05-14 10:36 PM

"Tears of discrimination" perhaps,
a very deep and touching poem.

Lucidity is the answer to all problems

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