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Teen Poetry #2
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Junior Member
since 2000-02-29
Posts 11

0 posted 2000-02-29 10:47 PM

I was only eleven, eleven years old,
I walked outside into the freezing cold.

I took a right on that busy street,
When the car pulled up I could feel the heat.

When I looked inside I saw a man,
Sitting next to him was an open beer can.

He said he'd take me where I needed to go,
I wish on my life that I'd said no.

I got in his car and soon enough wanted out,
He didn't seem bothered when I'd scream and shout.

He was going the wrong way and into a wood,
He stopped the car like I wished he would.

Except when I got out I tried to get away,
I couldn't understand what he was trying to say.

I knew what he said as he continued to mumble,
Just in time for my pants to be in a jumble.

I went unconscious and awoke in a bed,
I was bleading severely from the head.

I looked to my left and I looked to my right,
And suddenly forgot what happened that night.

My mom was in tears my dad was a nervous mess,
I tried to recall but it was all fuzziness.

I had scars everywhere and bruises too,
The only question I had was simply who?

Who had done this when I'd done nothing wrong?
I fell asleep again and awoke to a Ding! Dong!

I looked around my familiar room,
I heard my mom downstairs with the vacuum.

I yelled her name and she ran upstairs,
I tipped over my water but she said who cares?

She sat by my side and looked in my eyes,
I sat there and listened to her worried sighs.

I asked her what happened I'll never forget her reply,
She lifted her head and looked at the sky.

I was raped by someone I'd seen only once in a car,
You can go to the jail now and see him behind a bar.

© Copyright 2000 babychicken_1 - All Rights Reserved
since 2000-02-12
Posts 238

1 posted 2000-03-01 02:39 AM

this is a powerful poem and an impressive first post.
if this is from personal experience i hope that life has only looked up since.

looking forward to reading more of your work


Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
2 posted 2000-03-01 02:47 AM

very overwhelming piece... my prayer is though that if this happened to you that you are coping alright, at 11 that must have been a terrifying and haunting experience that noone ever wants to go through. I like the ending I'm glad he's behind bars and I hope for a very long time.   HUGS to you

 Keep all the windows of your mind open
Anne Rooks

since 2000-01-31
Posts 228

3 posted 2000-03-01 02:12 PM

I liked the poem though I thought the title misrepresented it . . . welcome to Passions, great first post. I hope to see more of your work soon. Again, welcome.

 "The worst of what people do to one another is deceive.
Because when you love someone you control their version
of reality. If you lie to them that's like making them
autistic so that what they believe is reality is in fact,
not their true situation at all.

Senior Member
since 1999-12-03
Posts 872
just about where I want to be
4 posted 2000-03-01 02:37 PM

Is there an echo in here? LOL Welcome to Passions BC, Great first post also...I swear there is an echo in here!    

stay cool


 "For every beauty, there is an eye somewhere to see it.
For every truth, there is an ear somewhere to hear it
For every love, there is a heart somewhere to receive it".--Ivan Panin

Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034
Tulsa, OK
5 posted 2000-03-01 04:21 PM

What courage it took to write about that experience.  So terrible for an 11 year old.
I hope you will keep writing and posting your work here.  There are many supportive people who read these forums and encourage young writers.  Look forward to seeing more from you.
Welcome to Passions!

since 2000-02-03
Posts 129
South Pasadena, CA
6 posted 2000-03-02 07:17 PM

That was a great first poem. Like Danny said. It does take a lot of guts to write about such a horrible experience. Welcome to Passions.

 Better to die, and sleep
The never-waking sleep, than linger on
And dare to live when the souls life is gone.

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