cvan anyone suggest a title?

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Teen Poetry #2

cvan anyone suggest a title?

poetic_butterfly
Junior Member

since 2000-02-14

Posts 25
illinois, usa

0 posted 2000-02-21 08:51 PM

i've never had a problem thinking of them before, but now for some reason i have.....

your fluidity intrigues me
as you slide around your studio
like mellow jazz and
blues guitar
rhythms that play in bars
at midnight
while the bartender lends
his deep laugh to the melody
the harmony of the dancing crowd
young lovers sway to the sounds
as the blue haze of the neon signs
reflect the eclectic events to come
as you contemplate the next masterpiece
the buzz of the crowd
unintentionally calm
you sit, tap in rhythm
as you envision
the rhyme of your next sad song
play the tune a million
times in your head
and maybe i can be
that eclectic event
you're looking to find.....

....the words that stand still are often the ones that move us most....

LyricFetish
Senior Member

since 2000-01-13

Posts 528
North Carolina

1 posted 2000-02-21 10:22 PM

This is really different. It's like you've captured a moment in time. I don't want to suggest a title, I think it would be more meaningful if it came from you. Keep on writing my dear

"The bullets you bite from the pain you request, you're finding harder to digest" -Collective Soul

[This message has been edited by LyricFetish (edited 02-21-2000).]

White Wolf
Member

since 1999-09-18

Posts 371
Somewhere in the vast wasteland

2 posted 2000-02-22 08:06 AM

I like the way you have caught that moment. LyricFetish is right in that if a title comes to you it will mean more but often I cannot think of a title and need some suggestion. So I have one that seems to be throughout the poem. Something that has to do with rhythm. Maybe even Rhythm in/of the Night. Well I like this poem. Keep writing.

SD

If dying is the process of living life to its end.
Then what is living?

sweetcollege_girl
Senior Member

since 1999-12-03

Posts 872
just about where I want to be

3 posted 2000-02-22 09:34 AM

cool poem, girl! I echo LyricFetish and SD..if you need a title, one will come to you, but if not, I like SD's suggestion

stay cool

~~Lavada~~

"For every beauty, there is an eye somewhere to see it.
For every truth, there is an ear somewhere to hear it
For every love, there is a heart somewhere to receive it".--Ivan Panin

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