navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #2 » Swarming the hallways... (1st draft)
Teen Poetry #2
Post A Reply Post New Topic Swarming the hallways... (1st draft) Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA

0 posted 2000-02-20 09:14 PM

Swarming the hallways, students are walking,
Not even worrying whether they’re late.
Copying homework and loudly talking
In their normal, half-drowsing state.

Quickly, the freshmen adapt to the school,
No longer afraid of the task that they’re facing.
As long as each freshman acts like a fool,
Their reputation will be amazing.

     There are many in classes, quietly sleeping
     Walking in masses, in locker rooms peeping,
     Guiltlessly flirting, smiling, blushing,
     School team supporting, assignment rushing.

The seniors walk through the school with no care,
Neglecting their low, unacceptable grades.
Spending their income on the clothing to wear
To their endless and countless dates.

Unsure of the future, with nothing to do,
They wander around without a purpose.
And all, with exceptions of a limited few,
Appear to be perfectely calm on the surface.

     There are many at homes, partying, dancing,
     Glued to their phones, talking, romancing
     Constantly dating, meeting and splitting
     Summer awaiting, summerschool greeting.
     Homework ignoring by doing nothing
     Sleeping all morning, loudly laughing.
     Scholarships losing, college applying,
     And parent-using, mostly for money,
     Essays attempting, but never completing
     Appearing enchanting, supposedly witting,
     Simply not caring, excitmentment yearning,
     Term papers sharing, and never learning
     Knowledge restraining, and answers lacking,
     For next year remaining, for college packing,
     Diversely contrasting, the same appearing
     Brilliance casting and failure fearing.
     Strolling alone and walking in masses,
     There are many at home, many in classes.

But among all of those who do not do a thing
There are few who are striving to learn.
Taking pride in their power to reason and think,
To gain knowledge and wisdom they yearn.

     There are students in classes, reading and writing
     Wearing thick glasses, directions abiding
     Essay composing, and textbook keeping
     Working ‘til closing, and never sleeping
     Answers improving and paper misspending
     Constantly moving, distinguished, outstanding
     Honor Roll making and prizes obtaining
     Boring notes taking, advantages gaining
     Wasting their weekends, stopping at nothing
     Hundreds receiving, and teachers loving,
     Solution testing, and errors rewriting
     And never resting, dilemmas fighting
     Carrying pads, often marching in masses
     There are many in labs, many in classes.

© Copyright 2000 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved
Senior Member
since 1999-07-02
Posts 551
1 posted 2000-02-20 10:14 PM

You did an excellent job describing the two extremes of the high school spectrum, but you forgot us over here in the middle  .  I'm an honors student but I don't consider my self a geek.  Anyway, great job, I love all your work  


Member Elite
since 1999-06-16
Posts 3850
In the space between moments
2 posted 2000-02-20 10:14 PM

This poem says a lot, Master.  I'm sure many of us, including me, can relate to this.  Highschool is such a divided place.  Great work!  The flow could be improved somewhat, but other than that, I enjoyed it!

 *Krista Knutson*

"Every moment marked with apparitions of your soul...." ~*Sarah McLachlan- Do What You Have To Do*~

Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 528
North Carolina
3 posted 2000-02-20 10:22 PM

Well, I guess if you've spent a day in one highschool, you've experienced them all. Your poem was perfect. Teens are either slackers or perfectionists, for the most part. well, for example, me and my sister.  Way to make us face reality. Most impressive.
<so you're wondering which one I am...>

 "The bullets you bite from the pain you request, you're finding harder to digest" -Collective Soul

Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA
4 posted 2000-02-21 02:08 PM

Thank you all for those kind comments,

Angel, I'm one of those myself, but that's not what the poem is about.

Alwye, I just wrote this so I'll work on it a lot more to make it flow better.

LyricFetish, I'm guessing you're the wild type? LOL

since 2000-02-07
Posts 317
New Orleans, Louisiana
5 posted 2000-02-21 03:04 PM

hey!  what about the stanze for those of us that did just enough to do good?  i was far froma slacker yet far from studious...where do i get to go? purgatory?  oh well..


Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781

6 posted 2000-02-21 04:05 PM

Great poem Master....your poems are always great. The way you've descriped highschool is amazing, but I guess you did leave out the people in the middle. There are lots of them. Great job anyhow.


 "Not all the answers lie within your realm or mine, they lie within the borders."

since 2000-01-20
Posts 89
Bonduel, WI USA
7 posted 2000-02-21 04:13 PM

that is a really good poem although as being a senior i don't agree with that part... us seniors put in our time and hey some of us still do have to work to get good grades not all of us slack off.  other than that i think you desribed my school excatly.
Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867
Boston, MA
8 posted 2000-02-21 11:20 PM

Thank you all!

rich-pa, I don't think that purgatory is for you, I'll think of something to include your type in this poem.

Salooma, thank you, but the poem was about the extremes of high schools, people in the middle (and I'm one of them) are boring to write about.

Sunshine, that's what the last two stanzas are about! Thank you for responding!

Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549
new orleans
9 posted 2000-02-28 11:49 PM

master: *waa haa haa haa* i love this... absolutely love it... i remember being a senior, though i think i fell in the same category as rich: i skipped to college early i suppose... never spent much money on clothes, but i kept my grades hovering at passing, and i sure was calm about it all... thanks for the journey back in time    

jerome the mysterious priest

 Disarm you with a smile
And leave you like they left me here
To wither in denial
The bitterness of one who's left alone
--[billy corgan]--

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #2 » Swarming the hallways... (1st draft)

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary