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Teen Poetry #2
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since 2000-01-31
Posts 89

0 posted 2000-02-17 02:20 PM

The sky has turned mad,
Its violent colours so viciously bright,
Lost birds,hopeful birds, jump in and out of those dying hours,
Aimlessly searching for the blue sky,
The world seems so dead,
Its monsters so alive and ready to take,
The winds so cruel, winters and summer filled with hate,
The grass has been burned , gone charred black,
Those red hot stones now live on my blood,
Not caring for the hurt  that breathes me,
The life flowing in my veins has turned so black , so white, so thin…
Maybe I was a myth ,a joke,insane,a human maybe,once long ago,
So many times I have asked that same rusty question,
The answer that I got were nothing but raw tears , and laughing pain,
This soul that I possess , this little goodness in me, is ready to pounce and leave me to die,
So be it!
Be gone….I don't need never wanted this lie,
For the day I was born , all others died and left me ….
To live and maybe to love!

© Copyright 2000 faith - All Rights Reserved
Senior Member
since 1999-12-03
Posts 872
just about where I want to be
1 posted 2000-02-17 02:30 PM

Wow! Such vivid imagery! I loved your poem Faith! Terrific!

stay cool  


Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549
new orleans
2 posted 2000-02-17 07:53 PM

faith: this is beautiful... this poem just sings... i especially like the last few lines and the way they are arranged... the sounds and words and ideas resonate in my head like the ringing of a bell... i see something of a decrescendo on the last few words "...and maybe to love"... as if the speaker is suggesting such a noble thing without any hope of its fulfillment... i also really love the line "Lost birds,hopeful birds, jump in and out of those dying hours"... very spiffy  

jerome the melancholy priest

 Disarm you with a smile
And leave you like they left me here
To wither in denial
The bitterness of one who's left alone
--[billy corgan]--

Senior Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 528
North Carolina
3 posted 2000-02-17 09:08 PM

What was it you said to me about "pretty poems'? This one is great! Good job.  

 "The bullets you bite from the pain you request, you're finding harder to digest" -Collective Soul

Junior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 25
illinois, usa
4 posted 2000-02-18 07:16 PM

awesome imagery. i can picture everything you've said so clearly! amazing.

 ....the words that stand still are often the ones that move us most....

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