Teen Poetry #2 |
Dear Mother and Father. |
chic Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 245yellville, Ar, U.S. |
<font face="Arial, Arial, Verdana" color="#871f78" size="2"> This is a poem that was inspired by Salooma and kari's poems. I have tried and yet I fail. I've done everything everything but wail. My older sister you want me to be. Can't you see she is not me. I can't do it tis not easy. For as most can see you keep me busy. Clean the house Put YOUR shoes on. What will you do when I am gone. I can't take it it makes me tired. For only in the morning am I ever wired. When i get home is when u start. You say I am slow and not very smart. Where's the thank you's the tenderness and care. Where's the love that you and my sister share. I feel as not apart of this family. I begin to wonder will anyone love me. I wish I were a daughter and not a slave to be used. I want to be loved not emotionally abused. Can't you see this is me. Can't you love who i want to be? I will love you my parents you are. But your love for me will forever be afar. </font> [This message has been edited by chic (edited 02-09-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Barbara Mendoza - All Rights Reserved | |||
sweetcollege_girl Senior Member
since 1999-12-03
Posts 872just about where I want to be |
Great poem sis...you hit the nail right on the head! Dad is always talking about connie, and "Why can't you be like her?" etc. why can't we be daughters instead of slaves??? I wish he could see what he is doing is wrong.. wishful thinking huh? *sigh* ~~Lavada~ p.s. i liked the poem.... "For every beauty, there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth, there is an ear somewhere to here it For every love, there is a heart somewhere to receive it".--Ivan Panin |
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Crystalina123 Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 228 |
I really like the poem, though I don't have a suggestion for the title, though I completely identify with it! "The worst of what people do to one another is deceive. Because when you love someone you control their version of reality. If you lie to them that's like making them autistic so that what they believe is reality is in fact, not their true situation at all. |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
Great poem chic.....I have an older sister as well and know exactly how you feel. It's hard trying to live up to their expectations and when you get tired of it and try living up to your own expectations they can't accept you for who you've become. Life's defianatly a beach(sorry about that) and there is nothing you can do about it. Salma [This message has been edited by Jer (edited 02-07-2000).] |
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Corazon Senior Member
since 2000-02-02
Posts 1209 |
well I never felt like this as a daughter, but as a wife yes, really good job of putting your feelings to words....and for a title, if it was me I would simply title it "can't you see?" |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Chic, you poor baby! Oh you broke my heart! I'm so sorry your parents' are too blind to see you for who you are, a very sweet girl. I have two step daughter's and they are the light's of my life right along with my son. I hope you know it's not your fault, and it won't last forever, you'll be gone before you know it. -SEA |
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Salooma Senior Member
since 2000-01-28
Posts 781 |
Thanks Jer....I was hoping that didn't ofend anyone. Salma |
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Mistikman Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682San Jose, CA, USA |
Ahhhh, family problems, I know thee well. In my case, I have to live in my sisters shadow, with no hopes of ever filling it, no matter how much better than her I ever do. How about "Dear Mother and Father" as the title? I am not a poet, I am merely one who speaks in emotion |
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HelmutB Senior Member
since 2000-01-06
Posts 964Canada |
To name this poem is certainly not easy Well done how you presented your feelings Perhaps may I suggest "Love wanted" "Take me as I am" "What must I do" There are so many that come to mind I liked the poem The ability to describe life with words is similar to painting a picture; both can be powerful tools. |
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Majestic Member
since 2000-01-11
Posts 264houston, tx. |
hum,..how about "Love me as I am" Great job of expressing your feelings...Sooner or later they'll see you for who you are... It's sad that you should live in a shadow..but stick to yours guns and be yourself.. "To live is to love; To truly LOVE is to live!" ~kg~ |
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chic Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 245yellville, Ar, U.S. |
Attention one and all I have decided on a title and the winner is... DEAR MOTHER AND FATHER!!!! To be or not to be...that is the question. |
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rachella Junior Member
since 2000-02-10
Posts 39Indiana |
Thank you. I really understand this poem. It isn't easy, especially when you really love them and you really love your sister. How can you tell them when you don't want to hurt them? It's hard. Thank you. |
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Jer Member
since 1999-12-02
Posts 443USA |
Interesting! I know not what you speak of in this poem but, I know someone you should talk to about this. LoveBug is in if not the same situation something simmilar to it. she wrote about it and posted a poem about 3 weeks ago. Ask her about it. I know she loves to talk! "WRITING IS EASY. ALL YOU DO IS STARE AT A BLANK SHEET OF PAPER UNTIL DROPS OF BLOOD FORM ON YOUR FOREHEAD." Gene Fowler |
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Ender Member
since 1999-12-08
Posts 200Yuma, AZ USA |
I know this situation all to well. I wish i didnt, but i do. This poem very well states what is felt during those times. keep up the great poetry writing. -Ender |
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chic Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 245yellville, Ar, U.S. |
Thanx guys!! This may sound conceited but I kinda thought me and sis were the only ones in this perdicament, but now I know better don't I? Well thanx for the replies. "Life is a game and we have to play, but in the end...we all die."-by me! |
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chic Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 245yellville, Ar, U.S. |
*bump* "Life is a game and we have to play, but in the end...we all die."-by me! |
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dreamy_eyes Member
since 2000-06-17
Posts 67 |
Yeah I've been where you are right now. I hate trying to live upto my sisters expectations and never quite managing to achieve this. Hopefully they will see you for who you are! Great poem. Love Deb xxx |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
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~frustrated writer~ Member
since 2008-02-25
Posts 84 |
sooner or later, they would realize that you're far greater than your sister. that there's more to you than what they always thought. they just have to give you time and let you show what you've got. despite of that compares you got, i'm very sure that your parents are proud of you. cares for you. loves you. perhaps, you didn't see it because your heart is filled with so much hatred. is hatred the right term to use? **LiRa** |
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