Open Poetry #3 |
old October poem |
RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
October October, how could you leave me so soon? Here I am standing knee deep in November it's no longer a Hunter's but a Harvest moon. October, you're the month I want to remember. October, your frosty mornings chill me your sunny afternoons warm my face and your painted hillsides thrill me but somehow you've left without a trace. Childhood memories come back to me when the maple turns its leaves from green to red October bicycle rides among the leaves and then the bike is parked and I look for the sled. RB ------------------ if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming. [This message has been edited by RobertB (edited 10-10-1999).] |
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© Copyright 1999 RobertB - All Rights Reserved | |||
Dragoness Senior Member
since 1999-08-07
Posts 513 |
Nice poem,but I think it would flow better with some line breaks.For example: October, how could you leave me so soon? Here I am standing knee deep in November it's no longer a Hunter's but a Harvest moon. October, you're the month I want to remember. October, your frosty mornings chill me your sunny afternoons warm my face and your painted hillsides thrill me but somehow you've left without a trace. Childhood memories come back to me when the maple turns its leaves from green to red October bicycle rides among the leaves and then the bike is parked and I look for the sled ------------------ Set you heart free and your mind will follow. |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Beautiful! ------------------ Denise |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
I love it, Rob! ------------------ *Elizabeth* "Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low, But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..." "Something sweet, something sort of grandish, sweeps my soul when thou art near..." |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
You say that you know my soul.....Well you know how to touch mine. Lovely piece my friend. |
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hoot_owl_rn Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750Glen Hope, PA USA |
Oh nice...I love October |
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DreamEvil Member Elite
since 1999-06-22
Posts 2396 |
'Tis my favorite month and it is well portrayed here. ------------------ Now and forever my heart hears ~one voice~. DreamEvil© |
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Pepper Member Elite
since 1999-08-19
Posts 3079Southern Florida |
very lovely Robert.....wonderful imagery...... ------------------ May your days be filled with lots of sunshine and your nights lit up by golden moonbeams |
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RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
thanks guys...October is magical isn't it?? Dragoness....in its original format the poem was separated just exactly where you thought it should be,,,for some reason when I put it over in Word and then posted it I removed the spacing....who knows...but I agree with you. ------------------ if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming. |
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Munda Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544The Hague, The Netherlands |
I think I'm getting quite addicted to your way of writing. You translate something I feel in me, but seem unable to put into words. I'll be on the lookout for more of your work. : ) |
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
I really do like this a lot.... and I'm still looking for September... |
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Elizabeth
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 1999-06-07
Posts 6871Minnesota |
You know, it kind of reminded me of "October" by Robert Frost. ------------------ *Elizabeth* "Dwelt a maid belov'd and cherish'd by high and low, But with autumn leaf she perish'd, long time ago..." "Something sweet, something sort of grandish, sweeps my soul when thou art near..." |
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RobertB Senior Member
since 1999-09-26
Posts 1104Champaign, IL |
never read Robert Frost....heard of him though!!! Maybe I should look at his "October" ------------------ if you can dream; you can fly...if you are flying; you are dreaming. |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
and it's my birthday month |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
Enjoyed ARCTIC WIND |
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