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Wendy
Junior Member

since 1999-09-10

Posts 16
Vermont

0 posted 1999-09-11 07:18 PM

They stare at the birdie with haunted posture,
Starched men holding their collective breaths
Beneath waistcoat and cumberbund,
Willing themselves out of a fidget,
And praying the moustache wax won't melt
In this relentless noon sun.
The wives and daughters, cinched grim
In petticoat and cruel wire,
Dab at moisture clinging to lips
Like the steam of the china teacup.
Their mouths, strained at the corners,
Poised terse and ready for posterity.
In hushed sepia tones they record the moment,
In tintype later mouthed by the teething babe,
Generations of classical noses and chiseled jaws,
Of wearing someone else's eyes
Along with the hand-me-down lace.
It seems the all of history
Was awash in brown brick,
And wan desolate composures;
The family pearls strung like a noose,
The watch fob dangling like a hellish chain.

Isis
Member Ascendant

since 1999-09-06

Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland

1 posted 1999-09-11 07:24 PM

Well written, but you make the whole era sound so dismal and fake. The times were happy only perhaps not the photography.
It would've been a wonderful time to be in the world........:

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Words that enlighten the soul are more precious than jewels.
~Isis~

Paul Allen Lupien
Member

since 1999-09-09

Posts 114
Ferndale,Mi.USA

2 posted 1999-09-11 07:50 PM

Yes,yes,yes! The poem has a unique vision,a perspective never quite seen before-worth writing and well written.The sepia mood is a real one and dark as it may be,it serves to remind us that our tiny "reality" is not absolute but that it is absolutely tied to a larger picture-linked to a forever past,we are the past of someone elses future-a sobering thought indeed which can enlarge ones own life-thought parameters.To me,this is a very good poem indeed.

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hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius

since 1999-07-05

Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA

3 posted 1999-09-11 08:09 PM

Nicely done...wonderful use of imagery in this piece. I've had the pleasure of seeing some of these old, old photos of mambers of my family. Everyone bundled up in their, or someone elses, Sunday best to get their picture taken. Fake smiles plastered on weathered faces. I especially liked these last two lines
"The family pearls strung like a noose,
The watch fob dangling like a hellish chain."
Wonderful!!

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"The role of the writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say." ~Anais Nin

Denise

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-08-22

Posts 22648

4 posted 1999-09-11 08:12 PM

I enjoyed this Wendy. I have seen pictures like this from the past! You describe them very well, indeed!

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Denise

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

5 posted 1999-09-11 09:30 PM

I enjoy the entire poem but "willing themselves out of a fidget" really strikes me. So I'm strange......

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

6 posted 1999-09-13 08:41 AM

Wendy, the ultimate compliment is that one of the other members, Savana, told me to go and read this poem of yours. And I am so glad she did. The attorney I work with is a re-enactor of the times you laid out so well in this piece...with your permission, I would like to give him a copy of this.

Well done, young lady.

Wendy
Junior Member

since 1999-09-10

Posts 16
Vermont

7 posted 1999-09-13 11:05 AM

Thank you for the compliment, and yes, of course you can use it! To get my full name, e-mail me at [email protected] :-)

Billy
Junior Member

since 1999-09-05

Posts 25

8 posted 1999-09-13 01:44 PM

This one is flawless. Thank you for sharing it with us. You are very talented. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work.

Michael

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-08-13

Posts 7666
California

9 posted 1999-09-17 10:35 PM

Wonderful work, Wendy,
Glad I found my way back to this one.

Michael

Nan

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-20

Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA

10 posted 1999-09-17 10:45 PM

I'm picturing "classic noses and chiseled jaws".... and yet another from the 2Lip one... C'mon back now, hear???

Wendy
Junior Member

since 1999-09-10

Posts 16
Vermont

11 posted 1999-09-20 03:31 PM

Thank you all for your kind words! This one has been ruminating around in my head for quite some time! :-)

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