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The Lady of Shallot
Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818
USA

0 posted 2001-10-31 04:28 PM



The buttons were all missing from his coat
and his shoes had holes in them.
The leaves were falling into an anthology of
all his books, all his dreams, his poetry, all
he had written through the years he had saved.

He reached into his pocket and took out her picture.

“Anna, did you know how I loved you?
No, I was too serious or maybe I wasn’t serious
enough.  I let the walls down for just a time
but then I …oh, why did I meet  you at the wrong time,
the wrong place?  Why did it have to be so brief and
so saddened by circumstance? I did love you, I did.”


He walked to the park bench and sat down, his bones
ached.  Snow would be falling in another month or so.
By that time there would be no more walks.

He looked up toward the sky and began to pray to his God.

Well, here I am, eighty years old, look at me. Wrinkled,
hands shaking, legs bent and back crooked. Only way
I could please a woman now is with my tongue, well
those days are gone.  I…I told her I’d be there for her,
you know, to look after her but there wasn’t nothin’
I could do.  Nothin’  I knew she had a place in my world,
and she filled it for a time.  Wasn’t right, the way it ended.
Just wasn’t right.  Wasn’t nothin’ I could do.”


He wonders if she’s alive; somewhere out there.
Stars don’t seem as bright, wind has died down some, everything
continues as before. She must be part of it all, part of this
universe. The one she wrote about; never stopped writing, that girl.

“Lord, my son says it’s time.  I argued, fussed and feuded as
long as I could.  No sense in puttin’ it off.  Why, see these tears?
They’re the only part of me that ain’t dried up. The only part
that still feels.  You got a sense of humor, Lord?   Funny, I thought
I heard you chuckling through those trees over there.
Yeah, Sunnyvale.  They say it’s a fine nursing home,
one that will treat me right.  Don’t want to go there, sure will
miss these trips to the park, miss the …oh hell, (sorry, Lord)
an old man crying all over himself.

I’d give anything for the stereo to be playing “Blue Velvet”
by Bobby Vinton and hold her one more time, oh Anna,
all young and innocent.  Scared to death of me, she was and
who could blame her?  Still, she trusted and fell in love with me.
I know she did. Why, a girl like that doesn’t say it if she don’t mean it
right, Lord?”


He rose, stumbled for his cane and wiped a tear away.  His mouth opened
to say goodbye to the park, inanimate objects blurred,
he choked up.  

“I can’t….I can’t be penned in.  Don’t take this away
from me, God, please, I need this openness, I need this space….
maybe if I talk to the kids….. I can’t be alone, away
from this…this time.  No sense to it, I can’t go back.”

“But I’d give it all up for Anna…..all of it”


to be continued


-befriend yourself and you will never be alone-

-befriend yourself and you will never be alone-

© Copyright 2001 The Lady of Shallot - All Rights Reserved
Accordionmaid
Member
since 2001-10-28
Posts 153
MA/USA
1 posted 2001-11-02 06:35 AM


Oooh, I'm looking forward to part 2...
The Lady of Shallot
Senior Member
since 2001-10-03
Posts 818
USA
2 posted 2001-11-02 09:14 AM


thank you very much, won't be long...

-befriend yourself and you will never be alone-

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