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Critical Analysis #1
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Ted Reynolds
Member
since 1999-12-15
Posts 331


0 posted 2000-01-18 04:56 PM


     STARTING TO MAKE THINGS HAPPEN

There's so much to be done'
You won't catch us nappin'.
Let's get on the road,
Startin' to make things happen!

We've got to get taxes
And all of that crap in.
So out forms and pencils,
And start to make things happen.

But before we do that
There is such a huge gap in
Our wide correspondence
(From N'Awleans to Ja'pan.)

And I'm behind on my joggin',
Ought to get another lap in,
And post something to the Forum
To get 'em all clappin'.

And the walks must be shovelled,
And we should be trappin'
Those birds in the dryer --
Or something may happen.

Just to plan it all tires us,
So don't come a-rappin'
On our door just now, 'cause
You'd just find us nappin'.


© Copyright 2000 Ted Reynolds - All Rights Reserved
Wordshaman
Member
since 2000-01-17
Posts 110
Illinois, USA
1 posted 2000-01-18 05:02 PM


Hahaha....this was awesome...the rhyme matched the content, and it flowed perfectly.  And I can totally relate.  See you around, I'm sure.

Wordshaman

jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
2 posted 2000-01-18 05:10 PM


I liked this very much.  And the gotta "post somethin' in the Forum" part is why I'm "behind on my joggin'".

Anyone interested in joining a Passions twelve step program with me?  

 Jim

"If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther


Not A Poet
Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885
Oklahoma, USA
3 posted 2000-01-18 06:05 PM


Amen, brothers.


 Pete

Kirk T Walker
Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 357
Liberty, MO
4 posted 2000-01-18 06:57 PM


That's funny.  I love the way the first and last stanzas are opposites "you won't catch us nappin'" and "You'd just find us nappin'".  I also like the way you used the "-ing" words to ryhme by slicing off the "g", since often people pronounce them this way.  Nice work.
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navwin » Archives » Critical Analysis #1 » 14,000 Things to be Happy About (#13)

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