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| Critical Analysis #1 |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA 
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leaving it behind, the cornerstone I’ve met, From then on making a decision was all that is left [This message has been edited by Xeonox (edited 05-23-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Ronil B Tataria - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Joricho Member
since 2001-05-06
Posts 56Australia |
Not sure if this is a typo or some profound meaning, but don't you mean: from THERE on / from THEN on??? It has a melancholy feel, which I like, but it's a bit obscure for me! |
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Kirk T Walker Member
since 2000-01-13
Posts 357Liberty, MO |
I think you could cut this one done 4 lines by removing the middle line. Should "is left" in last line be "was left" ? Disclaimer: The preceding statement is just my opinion. |
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7 Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 113Amherst, MA, USA |
I'm not familiar with your writing, so I'm not sure what you intended, but as I was reading I was thinking, wouldn't it be intelligent if someone made a bunch of grammar and spelling mistakes to make a point in their poem? Although I'm not quite sure what that point would be. And not that it's not a good poem without the mistakes. Just going out on a limb for a sec...  7 |
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Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
This poem is about me turning 20 last week. Ronil (One becomes god only when they have fully understood the role of being a human being.) |
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