Critical Analysis #1 |
A Dream of Hope |
Matchstick McGee Junior Member
since 2000-05-15
Posts 26Austin, Texas |
Hey everyone, my first post outside of teen poetry (woohoo!). I wanted some more serious feedback so I can develop my writing skills. I'll probably post here more often now. A Dream of Hope On angel wings I soared through endless skies One night as I lay snuggled in a dream I saw the world through an angel's eyes Until the dawn came with early sunrise I danced under the starry, moonlight gleam On angel wings I soared through endless skies A witness to the day that we will rise Above our groundless spite and petty scheme I saw the world through an angel's eyes I flew, mourning, through wars of every size With hopeful tears in never-ending stream On angel wings I soared through endless skies Inspired, I viewed the day of Hate's demise And knew that time would come for Love's regime I saw the world through an angel's eyes And though I woke to hear Man's suffering cries For once I did not feel the urge to scream On angel wings I soared through endless skies I saw the world through an angel's eyes Hold no suggestion/comment/criticism back! Especially better title suggestions! -Matchstick |
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© Copyright 2000 Christopher Chupco - All Rights Reserved | |||
amazon_lover Member
since 2000-04-09
Posts 491Dublin,Ireland |
Well done MM it was a good poem and the ryhming is good. I guess you've portrayed the person you see in reality and the same person you see in dreams. There's a contradiction here and I guess that was your idea. Sincerely A_L |
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patricianne Member
since 2000-05-04
Posts 66 |
Hello there, I am just a novice myself, but I thought was a great poem. I really liked the repeats. I also thought you did a good job of carrying the reader through time, and at the end giving us hope. I will reread several times to look for crits, but I think it's a fine work!! |
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