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Runner's High
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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Runner's High |
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whipsnade Junior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 40 |
RUNNER'HIGH Its kind of sad in a way but truly glorious When you finally make it after so long. I suppose if it happened any sooner you couldn't stand the sheer joy of it For a whole lifetime. That bursting forth of heart and rush of tears so sweet That come gushing out with the screaming out Of an 18-year old's rebel yell from imprisonment In a 60 year old hulk of humanity, Jogging, Are you laughing? down the road. It must be the endorphins man! Right? You just ain't heard no music, no real music as it was meant to be heard, Until you've heard it in stereo with your lungs full, body in motion Eyes tearing, mind soaring, soul loving, moving in time and in Stream sensing all creation, down the road. Toward that point in life's full karmic circle where self is found, And recognized and knows for better or worse, That its all done. You are what you are no matter what, No matter how you got there, And it don't make no nevermind No how no more. That's it man! And its great! And the music plays, sweet melody syncopation, tap-tap, doop-doop, Soaring guitar solos Larry Carlton's riffs and harmonic runs. The simple testimony to mans perfect art in the new age cool country jazz reggae Sounds of "Strength in Numbers" tinkling mandolin bass viol and banjos. And the old guy, you'd wet your pants to see it. He does a double dipsey doodle, one step back two forward in time to the music, Laughs in his own private world and goes on laughing to himself In his new found secret joy, down the road. |
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| © Copyright 2000 whipsnade - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Tony Di Bart Member
since 2000-01-26
Posts 160Toronto, Canada |
Hello I have passed your poem several times. Opened it, read it and closed it. I have just re-read it. I like it overall. However, I think that you sway from your theme several times. I get the music and the running and the high. But You give us bits and pieces of it in diffrent stanza's. I think you could solidify the poem by making one stanza about running, one about music, one about the high and one about how they tie together. That's just my humble opinion. See Ya |
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whipsnade Junior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 40 |
Mr. DiBart Thanks for the critique, your points are valid and I have considered "cleaning it up" a few times but fought the impulse in hopes sombody could tell me what I had in mind. In a cross reference to your response to my comments re; your poem. It was truly a compliment to your work and your obvious love and respect for your parents. One caveat to my observation however,, I think we became aware of our complementary temporal philosophies about ten years into the marriage and have spent the last 34 years adjusting to it. I don't know how she does it. Thanks again,, Ricardo |
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Diana B Member
since 2000-03-10
Posts 97 |
i liked this a lot the pace to me was like joggoing/running what could be seen as somewhat disjointed thoughts is for me exactly what happens when the freedom of the run takes over the conscious thought process just my experience interjected |
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Marq Member
since 1999-10-18
Posts 222 |
From reading this poem, which I liked a lot, I get the impression that a 'runner's high' is inextricably connected to the music he's listening to as he runs. Is that what you're telling us? What if someone runs without headphones and music? Then what can we expect? Well worth the effort to read it nonetheless! |
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whipsnade Junior Member
since 2000-02-28
Posts 40 |
To Diane B.and to Marq Thank you so much for unlocking the raison detr'e, of the structure. This was written some years ago { I hate to tell you how many} on the evening of the "event" which I believe was a personal epiphany engendered by the conjoining of both the music and the physiologlical/psychological high that runners know. It was disjointed as it occured and as it was written, complete with a crying jag IN vino veritas. Never the less it was a valid and meaningful personal moment. I hope that the poem did it justice. to Marq,,My answer is you don't need the music to achieve the metaphysical "awareness" that pervades the conscious in an unrestrained rocketing through an uninhabited road trail or forest..That is a marvel unto itself which I heartily recommend. Thank you both so much for reading, enjoying and helping me to clarify this old adventure. best regards, Ricardo {whipsnade} |
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