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| Critical Analysis #1 |
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They Always Said... |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563
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I had already written this, but was inspired to post it by Philip's comment that he was "too nice". my mother always said, you're too sensitive, just too sensitive for your own good, and I think she was right, for I cannot bear to hurt or be hurt. you're too nice, the last thing I'd wanna be thought of is "nice", my sister always said, and I think she was right, for I treat others as I would like to be treated, but I do get trod upon. a colleague always says to me, you're such a strong, intelligent woman, but I don't think she's right, for she sees the woman I wear, when the need is there, a mask of avocation... occupational wardrobe. There've been times, arriving home, I forget to fully undress, to drop the mask held in place by insecurity. I wonder what my colleague would say, if I stood before her naked, stripped of professionalism, would she still think "strong and intelligent", or would she then also see that I am too sensitive, and too nice... for my own good. Kristine [This message has been edited by warmhrt (edited 01-30-2000).] |
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| © Copyright 2000 warmhrt - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
Oooh, this is so good, my thoughts are that she would probally find that someone just like herself, minus her own mask. We all wear a mask of some sort for protection, in a harsh enviroment. It so nice to be able to take off our masks in Passionate Forums! |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
Kristine how ironic "inspired by Philip's comment", you and I could do each other some serious damage  (this is the man who sends an e-mail and then after no reply in 5 minutes gets to thinking he's mortally offended the recipient ..lol).Seriously though I can REALLY identify with this especially the line "stripped of professionalism", I spent 20 years acting a part at work ... not "nice" at all I can assure you.. It's hard for me to critique the poem as a poem because I get preoccupied with the message, but then maybe that is what this is all about. Philip PS now maybe you can see why I'm so wounded by those hurtful unprovoked comments of Jim's PPS Hey I didn't offend you with my mention of your name in my poem "For Jim etc" did I? Gettin worried here .. PPPS Obviously not ~smile of relief~ I just read your kind and funny reply .. thanks [This message has been edited by Poertree (edited 01-30-2000).] |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Septsong, Nice to see ya...it's been a while. So glad you enjoyed, and, you're so right about Passions, or anywhere else in the virtual world. It's easy to be yourself when you're behind the computer screen. Philip, I just read your reply to my victory speech. I'm not pushing it at all...you just can't take it. You know I'm just teasing you...but the GRRR's scared me a bit.Now about Jim, well, don't be bothered by him...I can read him like a book (oh,oh ... cliche). He's just a big softie on the inside. All the other stuff is just a testosterone-induced macho image he thinks he must maintain. He lets his mask fall occasionally. Kristine |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
Kris (Grasshoppa): I can really identify with this one too. You describe the tension between passive by nature/aggressive by necessity beautifully. Perhaps this is an example of why Bradley keeps insisting that all of the best poets in here are women. It's hard to "write" feelings (much harder than "feeling" feelings) but you do it very nicely here. Philip: While I openly and honestly admit to those "hurtful" comments to which you vaguely refer, I flatly deny (as would anyone else that KNOWS you) that those comments were unprevoked. Kris: No comment on the "big softie on the inside" indictment. And stop psychoanalyzing me in public! Isn't that unethical or something? Jim "If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther |
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Poertree Senior Member
since 1999-11-05
Posts 1359UK |
"UNPROVOKED" even ....... HEH HEH |
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Local Rebel Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767Southern Abstentia |
I think this illustrates your sensitivity....  ...I wouldn't stand naked before your co-worker though -- you could get sued for that. Just try it on us. We won't litigate! Nice poem too! |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Jimteach, Thank you for your kind remarks. I really liked that sociological phrase "passive by nature/aggressive by necessity". Mind if I use it? If I can, I promise never to bare another part of your psyche in public. Rebel, Thanks for the comment on the poem. As to the other...I'm also known for my modesty. |
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Trevor Senior Member
since 1999-08-12
Posts 700Canada |
Hello, Well Warmhrt I gotta say that I really like this poem. I liked the style and "voice" of it. Thought the second stanza was excellent. The "..." in the third seemed unnecessary. I thought the fourth stanza could have been expanded...perhaps the results of not dropping the "mask" when returning home. The last stanza was pretty good though I thought the "..."s weren't needed. Anyways, thanks for the read, take care, Trevor |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
Kris: You may use it but only if you use the proper citations/footnotes and include the phrase in quotes. lol. Conditional permission granted (no more reading my open book in public). Jim "If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Trevor, Thanks for reading, and also for the constructive crits. I will certainly consider them. Jimteach, Gotcha Kristine |
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