Cancer #7 No Dry Eye - pipTalk Forums

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jwesley
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-04-30

Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

0 posted 2020-11-10 12:52 PM

Cancer #7
No Dry Eye

Silence . . .
for a moment or two -
three - four - five,
while I gather the four walls
of my hollow space,
close all the doors,
shutter all the windows,
and in the dark,
where no one,
not even God,
can see -

I cry.

I clean my face,
remove the painted-on smile,
mess up my hair,
ruffle my beard -
I wipe at the dampness
running down my cheeks.
I become me,
with all my fears,
my pain,
my heart that bleeds
for those around me
that would rather keep me here -

I cry for my wife,
my daughter,
my soul . . .
if I've chosen wrong.

No dry tears,
in my hollow space.
No dry tears
when the time comes.

No dry tears as I go back
to my painted-on lips,
perfect beard and hair -

Silence . . .
while I gather the four walls
of my hollow space,
and in the dark,
where no one,
not even God,
can see - I cry.

© wesley james beard, jr.

September 04, 2020

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

1 posted 2020-11-10 04:06 PM

Peace and a hug to you.

Paul Wilson

Member Elite

since 2002-07-07

Posts 4711
United States

2 posted 2020-11-10 11:37 PM

James...Very somber write here. I understand
a little of what you're going through, my daughter passed away last year from cancer and my younger brother is in hospice care fighting it with not much hope.
Stay strong my friend and prayers being said tonight for you and him...Paul

~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~
Paul

jwesley
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-04-30

Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

3 posted 2020-11-11 09:23 AM

Paul, my heart is heavy for the struggle your family is going through. Hang in there, my friend . . . I am.

j.

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

4 posted 2020-11-11 10:37 AM

very deep, Jwesley, bring to you some courage and a heck of precious hope, tour poem has great "effect"
yann

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

5 posted 2020-11-11 02:49 PM

Jimmy,
Good that you should cry, regardless of who sees. You have every right and reason. Not that you should drown yourself in a relentless downpour, but tears have a time and purpose with no explanation or apology needed. If I know you at all, I believe you are fighting the good fight. ~L

Temptress

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 1999-06-15

Posts 7136
Mobile, AL

6 posted 2020-11-15 08:35 AM

I used to think that refusing to give in to crying was a weak thing for a person to do. What I think now is that the strength is in the mastery of the emotion. Knowing the right times to give in and knowing when to let it out makes a difference. Determining that is an entirely individual thing either way. I wish, for you, all of the moments you need to allow yourself this.

Enjoyed, J

"I know this love will tear me to pieces
I know his hands will dig up my secrets"

Meg Myers

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