Open Poetry #48 |
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Scrambled Dreams |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart ![]() |
Scrambled Dreams This mind scrambles over dreams like kittens over ‘nip rolling and tumbling in the thrill of chasing it until it stops like a frozen movie frame and melts over the lamplight of the camera in front of these eyes so that in its predawn, shivering awake throes throw me and my heart into those exasperating palpitations of disquieted interruptions and this mind scrambles like fresh eggs in a sizzling hot fry pan trying to unscramble them and put then back whole into the shell, trying to find its god- forsaken come-about, why this, why now, what message is it bringing me, and why, oh God why won’t the answers come? Then I remember, as the dawn creeps in that all good things come to those who wait so I tuck the real of night away, back behind my broken heart, which won’t ever fully heal, when I stumble up to find the mirror of my day, weirdly attempting to adjust these wrinkles into a smile, not to falsify my soul, or self, but merely trying to keep from scaring others. © krj 4-1-2012 |
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© Copyright 2012 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved | |||
secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
Especially fine beginning!: "This mind scrambles over dreams like kittens over ‘nip rolling and tumbling in the thrill of chasing it until it stops like a frozen movie frame and melts over the lamplight of the camera..." sometimes though, only darkness & loneliness come to 'those who wait' ... |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
"when I stumble up to find the mirror of my day" I love this line, Karilea. It was unexpected and caused a surprised grunt from me. Sometimes we let our imagination get the best of us, and most of the time we find out that things are not quite as bad as they seem. ~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~ |
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ice Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404Pennsylvania |
When I read this considering punctuation, and breaks, I taste a slight flavor of "leaves of grass" on my tongue.. humanly delicious, and Whitmanesque. When I read it disregarding punctuation, and stanza breaks, I run out of breath right at the end, like reading "howl" in that respect. A bit Ginsbergish, but of far different content. But which ever way I read it, I know it is pure, and uniquely sunshine poetry, and very enjoyable, no matter the way it is read. "Poetry is an echo, asking a shadow to dance." Carl Sandburg [This message has been edited by ice (04-01-2012 07:57 PM).] |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
My heart is beating a silent wow, guys... for the insights, the considerations, and the reminds me of.... I'm going to silently deem myself a ![]() |
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ice Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404Pennsylvania |
Deem away, you deserve it..it is a "keeper". I wish I could add that little jumping gremlin, but I don't know how..:-) |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
"Then I remember, as the dawn creeps in that all good things come to those who wait so I tuck the real of night away, back behind my broken heart, which won’t ever fully heal" Love this verse. Beautiful poetry! JL ![]() Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself. |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
I think it's a keeper for me too. Karilea. Ida |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
I like my scrambled dreams with coffee (strong) and a little bit of toast. Sometimes it is the little things, like that, that keep the mirror from cracking. I have never known you to write something that is not a keeper, Karilea. Your diversity in forms and subjects always leaves me in a bit of awe. ![]() |
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luminosity Senior Member
since 2005-11-18
Posts 813 |
your mirror must be kinder than mine, either that of I have quit caring how scary I look...lol...no really, this is a really insightful write......much enjoyed |
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ebonygirl Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000California U.S.A |
I love your poem Sunshine! "Scrambled dreams, like scrambled eggs" when salsa and avocado are added, become the spice of life. I see you like Sophia Loren; naturally beautiful. The lines of wisdom and her woman... traced by the tender finger tips of her loves, never forgotten by them. |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
A metaphorical masterpiece here, Sunshine. We all know what all the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't do but you carried it to a new level with the scrambled eggs and I like it! Are the dreams the scrambled eggs or the shells, broken and tossed in the garbage? I guess it depends on one's perspective, doesn't it? (waxing a little philosophically this morning) ![]() At any rate, the visions you portray in this piece are excellent. I doubt that you will ever find a mirror that doesn't smile back at you, as it should ![]() Btw, scrambled eggs go great with SPAM!! ![]() |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
Oh you nailed this one K. I might have thought you were writing about me if you hadn't personalized this. It always amazes me how, coming out of those dreams, I always feel like I've lost something intrinsically essential to my being... leaving only those scramblings you can never fully piece back together, (even with that urgency to have it done), till even those are smothered and forgotten in the demands of the day. In mythology, I always found it interesting that Death wass always portrayed as the twin brother of sleep. There has always been a more real feel to my dream-life than my waking one... and definately a more spiritual feel. Though I'm in no hurry to pass beyond this plane, I certainly do not fear transition to the next. It will almost be a welcome relief. Oops! Someone pressed my Babble button. I'll shut up now. Excellent writing though. Michael |
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suthern![]() ![]()
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
I loved every line of this... but the pictures you paint in the first and last verses really grabbed me! *S* |
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Spiros Zafiris Senior Member
since 2002-10-20
Posts 982Canada |
I don't try to catch/analyze every nuance--i just know your poetry, Sunshine, calms me --thus 'tis unique and inspired writing..thank you..>>spiros ~~ |
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