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Open Poetry #46
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

0 posted 2010-02-02 10:06 PM

The Tickle Me Elmo plant was hiring  and the blonde applied.
She felt so happy being hired the poor girl almost cried.
The boss said she would start tomorrow, told her what to do
And she was happy at the thought of doing something new!

Next day the boss was working when his door flew open wide.
"That new girl's made a mess of things!", his foreman loudly cried.
"Production's at a standstill. Dolls are cluttering the floor
And if you don't get rid of her, we can't take too much more!"

The boss walked out into the plant to see what was the score.
Tickle Me Elmo toys were strewn about the concrete floor.
The line was so backed up the poor dolls had  no place to go
And fell off the conveyor belt now moving way too slow.

He saw the blond down at the end of that conveyor belt
Cutting little squares of what appeared to be red felt.
She had a jar of marbles there and took them out by pairs
Then wrapped them in the squares of felt, oblivious of stares.

She then took each small bag and sewed it to the Elmo doll
Right between the legs! The boss let out a screaming howl!!
The poor girl dropped the  Elmo doll and all the marbles, too.
"What's wrong?", she said. "I'm doing just what you told me to do."

"I told you nothing of the sort!", the boss said, angrily.
"You've ruined this production day and made a fool of me."
"You've really made a mess of things and put us in a pickle.
I told you, when the dolls came by, to give them two test tickles!"

© Copyright 2010 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved
Robert E. Jordan
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
1 posted 2010-02-02 10:14 PM

Yo Balladeer,

This is a funny one.

It makes sense to me.


Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
2 posted 2010-02-04 06:58 PM

Thanks, Bobby
Senior Member
since 2000-02-14
Posts 685
3 posted 2010-02-06 01:54 AM

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha....  (deep breath) ahhhahahahahahahahahaha....

loved this one...

Never be a carbon copy of anybody...make your own impressions.  - ANON.

Jaki H
since 2008-01-19
Posts 232
4 posted 2010-02-06 01:27 PM

hahahahahahahah!!!!! This is hilarious!!!! i love it!
Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
5 posted 2010-02-07 02:35 AM

LOL!!!! oh I got it, I got it!!  rolling with laughter from Down Under !!  very good Michael!!  

Bisous de Sydney

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

Senior Member
since 2008-07-10
Posts 817
6 posted 2010-02-07 12:25 PM

Just two, Michael?  hehehe
Somehow, the idea of a Sesame Street doll
needing a 'cod piece' makes me cough, a bit.
Great stuff, amigo!

Indulge me here:  when Elmo first came out in stores, my family and I were shopping at Wally World for Christmas and I saw how violently the Elmo shook on the shelves when pressed by 'test tickles' by customers and was immaturely mesmerized.

I casually walked up to the 100 dolls on the shelves, and proceeded to tickle EVERY one, then slinked away and watched the carnage! (at  the chagrin of my family who tried desperately to disassociate them from me)

Dozens upon dozens of Elmos all shrieked laughter and shook until most tumbled to the floor.  I think we wound up leaving, before buying anything.

P.S.   Oh, almost forgot:
GO COLTS!!!!!!

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
7 posted 2010-02-07 09:44 PM

Woehahaha, I know I shouldn't read your poetry just before I have to go to bed, because now I won't get any sleep within the next few hours I guess. LOL

Just love it.

Like scattered words will flow

Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
8 posted 2010-02-11 02:25 AM

So funny, Michael.

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Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
9 posted 2010-02-14 06:47 PM


This is classic!!

Junior Member
since 2011-01-15
Posts 18
Ontario, Canada
10 posted 2011-01-15 05:31 PM

rofl... this is great
Senior Member
since 2010-07-01
Posts 1196
ME. In the Shadow of the Mt.
11 posted 2011-01-19 11:07 PM

LOL !! I've heard this one before but I like your version. Kat >^..^<
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