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After Juliet No Roman Pyre
| Open Poetry #46 |
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After Juliet No Roman Pyre |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Even grief wears thin And the rage I once felt when you left Has found home within the four white walls as shadow Next to the mirror I covered with black organza So I did not see myself as I walked by And know the reflection was as hollow As the heart or tears I have cried Now, this grief does not stop the wind And I shiver as in cold rain there were a fever That my marrow would hold but even the passing of time Has stopped in the hall and I do no feel Quite right wearing black overcoat To sip tea Soon, I will shed the black armband For it never stopped my pulse from reminding me How it is to count heartbeats unanswered Or stop the flow of clinched fists That poured from end of sleeves beneath the table as people spoke And I only wanted To go home But for now I will in convention place flowers upon stone Replacing the ones I left before For they have faded as have I with the new moons rise Being but a crescent of light to find its way Through curtain lace where it fails to warm The sheets of my bed And leaves light enough that I can see Even grief wears thin I worry now that when it is gone I will not know what to wear Or how To begin |
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| © Copyright 2010 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Eusta B. Mae Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903 |
Cpat, how heart wrenching! Your scribble screamed with grief! Eusta |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
EBM... then it captured something of what I wished ma'am... I was reflecting this morning on the parts of my family, no longer here...and on the grief that comes with such loss, and realized it was not the grieving itself that was so hard, but the what to do...when it wore thin and you have to decide what part of life to wear... a whim.... and a passing nod to WH Auden... |
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Eusta B. Mae Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903 |
I understand completely. Sometimes some people leave themselves nothing to wear but grief, however thin. They hold on to it like a security blanket. There is that point as you say, and some people cannot face it. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
EBM... true enough, some people do get caught in grief and can no longer cast it aside... the question that nagged at me however, was that in the act of transitioning, is the emptiness and the loss all the more real and are we even aware of it? What part of the legacy they left for us, as a part of us, do we clothe ourselves in and how doees it change the "who we are" in ways it didn't when they were here..... We live up to "expectations" or down to them..depending on what was given us by those who are/were family... or are we simply nudged by gravity and take on a slightly different orbit around our self center? (chuckling)..... my apologies... I woke this morning somewhat introspective and very aware of my own orbit... this is after all a very self indulgent piece... and one I probably should have thought about longer before it was shared. |
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Eusta B. Mae Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903 |
I'm glad you didn't think too much before posting....otherwise this wonderful piece of work may not have graced us this morning. However self indulgent you may feel it is, it addresses a universal question in a way that lets the reader think and feel deeper and more clearly into "the process". In doing for you you have done for others. Thank you. |
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bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
~~being no stranger to this garment...it's about how deep the bee stings inside the heart...and how deep & far the heart can run into its oblivion~~~ the title...startled me...the fever pitch mesmerized me....the voice, as ever resounded in me...to the very core~**~ |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Belle... sorry if the title startled you, it is a bit obscure I guess... still my mind drew the connection between how Juliets family or friends might have grieved once she was gone, and how it was not the "grand" pyre, but a much more private sort of grief... as for how deep the bee stings..( chuckling) I am reminded of line from an old Bogart movie...and one of the characters who is a rummy asks throughout the movie, "Have you ever been stung by a dead bee?" Because..yes even dead bees sting...and the depth of the sting is perhaps a reflection of the depths of the heart... glad the piece resonated somewhere within... and as I said, it is a self indulgent piece on my part as I explored my thoughts this morning... so you have my apologies if it upset in any way.. |
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bel1e Senior Member
since 2006-07-24
Posts 1631 |
not at all, Chief~ nothing wrong with a shake-me-down every now and then~~~~ |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
"nothing wrong with a shake-me-down every now and then~~~~" I thought shake downs were illegal and most often associated with some sort of organized crime? (chuckling) I did not intend to shake you you... truly~ |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
cpat..I had the armband tattoo'd on...lest if ever be removed without taking the arm with it..kewl stuff guy |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Not a bad idea at all DS... we all have plenty of lost friends or brothers to mourn.. it seems there is always a new one. thanks for your eyes on my scribble sir, always appreciated |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
As a geriatric nurse, I see grief on an almost day to day basis. I see it in families faces even before the actual death, when something worse than death steals away thier loved one. With what do you replace the mantle of grief? How about the one you wear now? The cloak of a loving poet? Who helps someone else shed that grief even if only for the time it takes to read sonmething you have written. Today you brought me outside myself...even if only for a moment...thank you |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Paula, thank you for the kind words and if the piece helped your day, I am honored... |
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The Lady Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634The Southwest |
a truly gripping piece hard upon the heart |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Thank you ma'am... |
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