Open Poetry #46 |
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"The delicate tangles of my hair cover the emptiness of your palm" |
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martiniat8 Senior Member
since 2003-06-21
Posts 897Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic |
"Its a little bit funny, this feeling inside..." How I look back, in my mind, my memory, like a scrap book of images, like a collection of old 8mm home videos How the first time together, you were nervous, playing with your scarf, twirling it around your fingers, looking up at the ceiling, trying to find the words, the thoughts, the feelings, the language trying to say it all trying to put it all together How you were exposing your long, graceful neck so tender, and sensitive and perhaps you didn't see, couldn't see my nervousness as my right hand reached down under the table and I I was... twirling the soft, black handles of my bag what do you call that? mirroring? chemistry? nervous apprehension? too shy to look each other in the eyes and I remember how you got up got up to go to the bathroom and in the edge of my perception I saw, saw perhaps out of my field of view even then, even then that first night you were staring at the top of my head and I noticed I became self concious thinking you were seeing, perhaps figuring out, wondering if I was losing my hair but no, no, that wasn't it it was curiosity, fascination like a child seeing something they had never seen before and now, still now, some 5 months and uncountable meetings later, now... I look in your eyes as we're speaking and I'm saying something and I catch you glancing but no, not glancing staring, lost in the curls of my hair how you were afraid to touch them and have grown a little bolder rubbing one between your fingers and then quickly putting your hands back at your side like you were afraid like I was some being from another planet some animal, some... Čert and how I told you, it's ok I want you to touch it and you said, "no, I don't want to change your hairstyle" I knew you were saying, "no, I don't want to mess it up" but oh I do, "I want you to mess it up" I did and then, the last time I saw you you were a little bit drunk and a little more bold pulling one or two out saying, "ooh, this is a long one" letting it go, seeing it spring about and back into place and your smile of delight maybe one got out of place one was sticking out and you stopped finally patting me on the head putting everything back into place only to sigh deeply that you had to go not so long ago.. in those twirls... and curls... gone wild. |
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© Copyright 2010 Kenneth Bradley Smith - All Rights Reserved | |||
icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
Great title! |
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Cpat Hair![]()
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
well done...Like Icebox, I like the title, and your descriptions of the acts, the scene tell well the underlying tensions and the desire.. |
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easy1 Senior Member
since 2010-05-22
Posts 1209Southeastern USA |
I sort of expected a paean to a beautician or a female barber... but this is better, I am sure! As for hair loss and how it can be unjustly fomented, best I don't get started on that right now. Nice descriptions of the author's lady friend's movements and socially-perceptible psychology. |
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Earl Brinkman Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183Osaka, Japan |
What fascinated me about this piece was the playfulness between the two and the twirling of fingers. Nice. |
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katahdin Senior Member
since 2010-07-01
Posts 1196ME. In the Shadow of the Mt. |
Very nice read Kat >^..^< |
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Eterne Member
since 2010-07-21
Posts 75Quebec, Canada |
Reading your poem was like going through my first date with my love all over again. Very nice! |
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