Open Poetry #46 |
To my Husband |
Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
I`ve tried to write you before but you won`t stay still- the way an artist might fume at an errant model, one whose beauty wants capturing in oil or tempra, your strength a force of nature- see, I so quick descend into cliche! What can I write to distill your essence? Is there another word for bronze for gold. for beryl eyes for marble david-form? You roll your eyes and laugh at your word-worn woman, struck with concrete tongue at the attempt. Well then I colloquialize, my hon, because- you`ll always be my long-haired surfer boy ignited by the sun and carrying the ocean in your eyes. |
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© Copyright 2010 Amaryllis - All Rights Reserved | |||
2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
wouah, this is so intense and limpid, a great song love with sensuality and deep recognition, enjoyed a lot my read. yann |
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Lamar Cole Member
since 2009-05-01
Posts 274 |
Nice. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
quote: I've worn these shoes... and I enjoy the truth that I am not alone. |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
So absolutely beautiful, dear Amaryllis! Love, Margherita |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
Oh this is just as sweet as can be. That's the best kind of love if you ask me! Wonderful writing, Amaryllis~ |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
And I thought the poem was deliciously sweet--and then I read your critique comment, amazed to find a cherry on top! This was a breath of fresh air in the sauna that is me. Loved it, enviously so. |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
I think you did a fine job in capturing what you see and feel. I'd say he's a lucky man to been seen in such light. "We'll chase them like rats across the tundra." |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
You've done it again. A perfect poem this time based on art images. See, I told you you couldn't over-post! |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
Many, many thanks to all above! So appreciated.. Best~Amaryllis |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
I have one of those long-haired ocean-loving boys myself great write! |
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