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Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2010-08-27 07:08 AM

small talk highway evening down off the 23
momentary glancing like absent minded dancers
watching each other perform their routine

she said it must hurt to ride that thing
very far without more padding here and there
and where would a woman ride if she were invited

I gave her a grin freely without commission
and she nodded appreciation without a refund
said she had been married to jesus for awhile

and he never took her anywhere without his friends
like she was something wet and shiny to show
and loan out sometimes after too much tequilla

she said my my kind of smile looked more comfortable
like a favorite chair of hers by the lonely window
when jesus was out buying whiskey for sinners and sins

I asked her to be seated if she had the time
not to just jump up after her urges were drowned
and run home to kneel and pray for forgiveness

with saliva sacrifices to her unknown messiah

_______________

daark (highway series)

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

1 posted 2010-08-27 07:13 AM

this one has some grit...and some very nice writing..

enjoyed as always sir.

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

2 posted 2010-08-27 07:42 AM

thanks amigo..

Eusta B. Mae
Senior Member

since 2010-05-03

Posts 903

3 posted 2010-08-27 10:05 AM

as always D, no one tells it quite like you. ebm

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

4 posted 2010-08-27 11:01 AM

thanks ms eb...

Sunkissed
Senior Member

since 2002-12-03

Posts 610

5 posted 2010-08-27 11:20 AM

Read this over a couple of times, DS, and each time got a different perspective.

I agree with EBM, nobody tells it like you.

cool read.

~Sunkissed

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

6 posted 2010-08-27 12:01 PM

thanks sunkissed...his name is/was heyzues I guess,,maybe that helps with the intention..

Earl Brinkman
Senior Member

since 2010-03-03

Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan

7 posted 2010-08-31 11:49 PM

I enjoyed this and how it built up the that incredible last stanza.

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

8 posted 2010-09-01 06:57 AM

Thanks EB...your reviews are appreciated

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

9 posted 2010-09-01 09:52 AM

Greetings, tall, dark, and handsome. I wish your readers could see your "kind of smile", as well!

Love your mellow-jello delivery. Even when there's an edge to your poetry, it's still very smooth ~ and highly visual.

EA

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

10 posted 2010-09-01 10:10 AM

ea....thank you lady friend

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

11 posted 2010-09-02 11:33 PM

I gave her a grin freely without commission
and she nodded appreciation without a refund

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ok then, it's all good, and that up there is just nice, the way it should be.

Oh, and I think you're nice too~

[This message has been edited by BluesSerenade (09-03-2010 12:06 AM).]

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

12 posted 2010-09-03 05:58 AM

babyblue...you are lovely lady!

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