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Open Poetry #47
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Lost Love
| Open Poetry #47 |
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Lost Love |
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ChemicalRepose Member
since 2004-03-28
Posts 102 |
Just as the moon on a cloudless day, you pull the thoughts in my mind like tidal waves. My parabolic emotions- as stable as the fault line- are waiting for the discs to shift, the Earth to shake, and consciousness to break. I have become neutralized, by your intellectual desires. These words, they would flow so naturally if you'd only let them. But, what else can I say to a woman whose beauty defines divinity, whose eyes proclaim innocents and intensity, and a mind the defies all boundaries. I put myself in a state of vulnerability in order for you to leave an impression within me. I will absorb every breath you take, (retain all the you're not) and heal the void in my empty heart. I feel myself slipping, slipping away becoming one of your distant memories. I'm falling through the chasm once filled with your energy, now dark and empty. My hand reaches out, grabs a hold in order to pull you close to me, but you are pushing away, pushing me towards complete apathy. I am to blame. |
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| © Copyright 2011 Ben - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
I really enjoyed how you opened with this. You start with very large, grand images and narrow them down to the end where there is just apathy. Much like watching water slip through cupped hands. It lent itself very well to your poem; added to it. |
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ChemicalRepose Member
since 2004-03-28
Posts 102 |
Thank you, and I like your comparison to water slipping through cupped hands. |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
Great genuine voice to this introspective piece. Best, Amaryllis |
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