Open Poetry #47 |
Dames, Whadda Ya Gonna Do With 'Em |
JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
She turned to me Sunset wasn't too far away Sinking Sol highlighted her hair Setting it on fire You have a hunk of granite for a heart, and polluted sewer water for veins. Lois, I think her name was Lois Lay her head back on the pillow Lazed out a low sigh Looked back at me, trying for tears What is it with youse guys, catch a broad's eye bed her and drop her? I flicked my Ronson Ignited a Camel Ignored Lois I think her name was Lois I'm no tramp, ya know, I got friends, buster, friends that'll drop you in the river. Smoked the Camel down to the nub Said, "What'd you say your name was?" Sage green were her eyes She looked a little saddle sore Aw, come on, big guy, tell me them things you said last night, you must be one of them poets. "Take a fin outta my shirt pocket," I said, "get lost." Tact is my middle name. The empty bottle of Tanqueray barely missed my head Intolerant people are the people who do not believe the way we want them to, which makes us intolerant by default.—July 26, 2010 |
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© Copyright 2011 Jerry Pat Bolton - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Sounds like what you need is a better class of "dames." Ida |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
No, Ida, I don't need a better class of dames. This was a takeoff of the old detective movies and books from the mid-forties. You know, a few weeks ago I was taken to task for getting personal with a poet about one of her poems. You are doing the same thing to me. I feel a strong resentment in your words as if you actually think this poem is how I am. It is spoof. Fiction. Thank you for whatever you think of me, that is your problem. Intolerant people are the people who do not believe the way we want them to, which makes us intolerant by default.—July 26, 2010 |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
I am sorry, Jerry. I guess I missread you. I did not mean to offend you. Ida |
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s1nfully_1nn0c3nt Senior Member
since 2003-10-26
Posts 1105Watertown, NY |
Fiction or not, I believe "dames" like that put their selfs in that position. I enjoyed the story. -Trina |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
Thank you Trina. Intolerant people are the people who do not believe the way we want them to, which makes us intolerant by default.—July 26, 2010 |
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faithmairee Senior Member
since 2011-01-05
Posts 1441Poe Haven, USA |
this is really great...pretty cool take off...enjoyed it much! There must be a poem in here somewhere. |
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The_Doctors_Angel_32 Member
since 2011-01-14
Posts 337Florida, USA |
I enjoyed this little tale of love spurned. You know some "dames" do put themselves into those situations but that ain't never gonna be me. LOL I truly enjoyed the read!!! When the family is together, the soul is at peace - Russian Proverb |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
Thanks faith, The_Doctors_Angel_32 for being here. ~ Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? / Because They Have Big Fingers. ~ |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
I think the dame almost nailed this on the head... A good take-off of the 40's... |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
I think so too, Sunshine. Thanks. ~ Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? / Because They Have Big Fingers. ~ |
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Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Saw it in black and white like Casa Blanca...too cool Jerry! Lori |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
Hah! That's the only way to capture this sort of memory. I still watch those old private eye movies, and even wrote one a couple of years ago called, "Ram Slade: Shamus." Thanks Lori. ~ Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils? / Because They Have Big Fingers. ~ |
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