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AncientHippie
Member

since 2009-10-15

Posts 411
Surfing the Cosmic Flow

0 posted 2009-10-27 10:09 AM

I do not believe
your acid tears
puddling the floor
around my feet.
Yet they dissolve me
completely,
leaving only
an emotional husk
that will,
eventually,
blow away
in the slipstream
of your indiscretions.

Sutra 30: Language reflects the Truth of one’s Reality: listen carefully when others speak.
Jim's Guide to Enlightenment

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

1 posted 2009-10-27 11:21 AM

AH..

I think I know her..

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

2 posted 2009-10-27 11:26 AM

Jim,this is not your usual fare. I like it, it still speaks the accurate truth you do so well! ~Lori

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius

since 2001-10-23

Posts 10549
By the Seaside

3 posted 2009-10-27 09:45 PM

Leads me to think of people who deliberately play on the emotions of others.

What a great write, hippie dude~
Sad but true~

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

4 posted 2009-10-28 02:37 AM

This is good, Jim, gets right to the point with style.
Ida

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

5 posted 2009-10-28 09:08 AM

Hello Jim, enjoyed the poem and its feelings, some people can be very tricky.

regards

yann

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

6 posted 2009-10-28 10:36 AM

You have a graceful way of getting straight to the heart of the matter.

AncientHippie
Member

since 2009-10-15

Posts 411
Surfing the Cosmic Flow

7 posted 2009-10-28 12:33 PM

Thank you all for your kind words. Encourages me to write more of this style.
Kindest regards,
Jim

Sutra 30: Language reflects the Truth of one’s Reality: listen carefully when others speak.
Jim's Guide to Enlightenment

unboundpoetess
Member

since 2008-05-24

Posts 477

8 posted 2009-10-28 07:34 PM

I like reading you this way.

Enjoying you,
Heather

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

9 posted 2009-10-28 07:45 PM

Most men are unable to cope with tears, regardless of their motivation. This is very good!

Love,
Margherita

ThisDiamond
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-02-22

Posts 9353
Michigan, USA

10 posted 2009-10-28 08:13 PM

Each syllable hit its mark.
Well done.

tommy738
Junior Member

since 2009-10-28

Posts 33

11 posted 2009-10-28 08:46 PM

Really liked it and can understand it as I am going through tuff times my self.

naturegirl
Member

since 2009-09-30

Posts 168
England

12 posted 2009-10-28 09:05 PM

"Yet they dissolve me
completely,
leaving only
an emotional husk"

Oh, I know that feeling from thankfully a long time ago. You describe it perfectly and the aftermath too..

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