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precious pearls
Member

since 2009-07-24

Posts 110
NJ; United States

0 posted 2009-07-25 09:33 PM

I Made It!

They didn’t think I could make it
They thought I was broken
But I’m standing here proud and strong
And for once, I don’t need to belong

I used to cry all the time
Now I’m the one who shines
People still talk
But I know I still rock

I didn’t know how to deal before
But since I’ve gone through that
I know Jesus really is my savior
I know now it doesn’t matter whether I’m skinny or fat
I know I’m strong and can make it through whatever
I now know that I’m better

I know that I can make it through the bad
Whatever obstacle comes my way
To other people’s dismay
I stand here with God as my comrade

I know I’m beautiful
I know that my family
Will remain true and loyal
Whether I’m sad or happy

I know that God will help me fight my demons
I know that my heart is my strongest weapon

I feel triumphant
Because I made it
I’m nobody’s twit
Because I’ve arrived

Always,
Kai (a.k.a. precious pearls)

arabesque
Junior Member

since 2009-07-26

Posts 14
USA

1 posted 2009-07-26 05:17 PM

It's great to be confident in yourself (: I must say, I like how your stanzas aren't all the same...they all just sort of melt into each other. Yea, that made no sense but I hope you get what I'm saying. Great poem (:

Forever,
Arabesque<3

precious pearls
Member

since 2009-07-24

Posts 110
NJ; United States

2 posted 2009-07-26 08:42 PM

Thanks I appreciate that and the fact that you were the first to comment!!

Always,
Kai (a.k.a. precious pearls)

Falling rain

Member Elite

since 2008-01-31

Posts 2178
Small town, Illinois

3 posted 2009-07-27 02:25 PM

I don't know if I've been stuck in a pattern when writing but the different stanza's just bugged me a little. But that's prolly just me. I liked the over all message in the poem. Just be careful too much confidence could rub off as arrogance or narcissistic. Good write though.

Clockwork_Orange
Senior Member

since 2007-03-23

Posts 620
Space Camp, IN

4 posted 2009-07-28 01:18 AM

very strong emotion and feeling inside the words, yet i feel that some parts are just a bit forced. an exceptionally interesting read, and i hope to see more posts soon.

~ you cant run from yourself ~

Just.Another.Falling.Star
Member

since 2008-05-08

Posts 422
Canada

5 posted 2009-07-28 12:14 PM

this was really encouraging. i like the flow of words and how it blended together. it was very nicely done.
but yeah, just be careful that too much self-confidence doesn't come off as pride.
over all it was wonderful!

library.

julianna

.:.:~]you clicked your heals and wished for me[~:.:.

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