Dark Poetry #5 |
My Monster and Me |
UNTAMEDelegance Member
since 2009-05-30
Posts 222Oregon |
My monster and me. My monster; the past. The future; me, but that's not what everyone sees. In their eyes I am no one; that's me. Monster, different; thorn in their side; cursed lament. When I sit and stare, they don't see me and I don't care. I gave up hope that they would see the difference between my monster and me. My monster wants blood. To make them pay for trespasses; unfading scars that never heal. I'll always be that monster to them. I'm marked; branded with the title Monster. The future; me just wants acceptance; to know that they won't turn away; won't shun It's hard to live, to think, let live; to stop the blood I want. It's difficult to live; let live; no hurt; no blood when you and the monster ... are one. |
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© Copyright 2009 Melissa ReneĆ© Axtell - All Rights Reserved | |||
MorningStar Member
since 2009-10-26
Posts 290Pittsburgh, Pa |
Wow. I get it. I mean I really understand exactly what your saying. Thank you for sharing this. Aenea If I don't say it...who will? |
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Stitches Member
since 2009-11-27
Posts 159United Kingdom |
Wow. I empathize. 'I feel like an animal, and I don't think that I get it. But one day I'll see you around.' |
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QuietAstronomer Junior Member
since 2009-12-13
Posts 18North Carolina, USA |
You have captured well the struggle so many feel. Well written. Thank you for sharing. QA |
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m48 Member
since 2009-12-02
Posts 108 |
totally able to realate to this.i liked to read this. |
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Father Member
since 2009-12-15
Posts 58Confusion |
Interesting form that seems to fit in quite nicely with the subject matter. Thank you for sharing. |
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noman Junior Member
since 2009-12-26
Posts 18 |
I agree, an interesting post. A good read. |
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fractal007 Senior Member
since 2000-06-01
Posts 1958 |
Interesting poem about the dark side of humanity. I appreciated the way you broke the dichotomy between the characters "my monster" and "me" with the stanza:
and arguably this one:
The monster seems comes out both as the dark side of the speaker and in aspects of the speaker's reaction to others' laments about the monster. Still, it would have been nice to add a bit more lines blurring the distinction between the monster and the speaker. Of course now I'm just philosophizing a bit too much. Thanks for sharing. |
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th1nktw1ce Junior Member
since 2009-07-13
Posts 24 |
I liked this alot. |
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UNTAMEDelegance Member
since 2009-05-30
Posts 222Oregon |
fractal007, I thought about what you said about adding more about the distinction between the monster and me blurring, but one of the key points that I was trying to make was the desire to distinguish myself from my monster and become a separate identity. I tried showing this and the struggle it takes to constantly separate myself in the fact that only a few are blurred, as if from a slip in control. Thank you for your thoughts! ~UNTAMEDelegance There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and lose that it's weird. |
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Trapped - Nothing Member
since 2010-04-25
Posts 52 |
FRANKINSTEIN!!!!!! DRACULA! Monsters are so real to many people. |
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VelvetVampress Junior Member
since 2010-04-24
Posts 26 |
woah...you did really good and im glad to have read it... and i can relate |
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littlemonster Junior Member
since 2010-05-06
Posts 39UK |
I think most people will recognise the monster we try to distance ourself from and yet remains a part of us. |
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