Open Poetry #43 |
Remember a Time |
jbal892 Member
since 2007-11-25
Posts 58 |
Remember a Time I once wrote a poem Of a Memory Lane. Heartaches and tears It did contain. But now this lane I'm walkin down; It contains joy In leaps and bounds. Rummaging through My old desk drawer, Pictures of you Were found once more It's been so long Since they last were seen With these fresh new images I will paint a scene Do you remember the day That we first met? There was certainly something That I did covet At first I knew not Just what to do That coveted something Definitely was you Do you remember the day Of our first kiss? That old memory I certainly missed I walked you to our corner, And told you good bye I pulled you close to me And looked you in the eye. Do you remember the day I first said I love you? Had to hide it from our parents Afraid of what they could do. It's been three years now Since I first professed my love Wait an eternity longer And this love still grows stronger Do you remember the day I said I still love you too? It wasn't that long ago I know I certainly do So you see, this Memory Lane It took a turn 180 Degrees Straight towards the sky While you are gone, Not a day goes by I'll sit there and pray Straight towards the sky But for now I must Lay down and rest Let my dreams do the talking For they always know best |
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© Copyright 2008 jbal892 - All Rights Reserved | |||
Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo jbal892, I'd drop the caps starting each line, and work on the punctuation. Bobby |
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jbal892 Member
since 2007-11-25
Posts 58 |
Yea, I realized that after I posted it and haven't had a chance to edit it. Usually I type these poems up in MSWord with punctuation and everything first then just copy/paste it over, but I'm giving this poem to someone and I forgot to type in the punctuation that I have written in on the paper. |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
it seemed like a sad piece. i hope all is better now |
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Moonkist Member
since 2006-09-29
Posts 197Pennsylvania |
This was beautiful and sad... thanks for the walk down this memory lane. |
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jbal892 Member
since 2007-11-25
Posts 58 |
Thanks guys. Things are definitely better now. The reason I wrote this is it was memories of a relationship I was in a few years ago, but we're getting back together sometime soon. I was laying in bed just thinkin and was inspired to write something of all the memories I had of when we dated last. Hopefully we'll make plenty of new ones =) |
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Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A broad smile came upon my face when I read your explanation for this touching poem. Love is not often given a second chance but when it does, "love is better the second time around". May this be the case for both of you! EA |
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jbal892 Member
since 2007-11-25
Posts 58 |
Yep, we both realized some things when we apart apart for the last year (it was actually a year last month, but who's counting right?). I definitely think I've been given a second chance by someone up above. |
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