Open Poetry #43 |
Hallelujah |
WindWalker Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 1218 |
Hallelujah City streets can be colder than stone when you're young, vulnerable and all alone nor are they ever paved with the rich man's gold when threadbare clothes leave you wet and cold. She comes to a familiar doorway somewhere in the night when she's lost her way and remembers all the days of her short life how desperately she'd run from strife knocked on strangers' doors for protection then ran away again from every nightmare. The man at the desk knows her as she tosses her hood approaches and puts her hand on the worn wood, and knows the words she'll say before she forms them: "I need a place for the night, do you have a cheap room?" He smiles at her - or is it a leer? and as he speaks, she can again smell the beer -- "I have cheap - forty dollars for a night at the inn - and I have free if you'll let me tuck you in." and his hand slips over her wrist and her skin tells him, for the mill she will ever be grist. He hands her two sheets and a pillow case: she grabs but he says, "Easy, no need for haste." Here's the key - it's three - o - four - and don't forget - don't lock the door." He watches her walk to the rickety stairs, shoulders slumped, but doesn't feel her despair and in her head as she steps on the first rung she hears the lines from an old song she'd heard sung: "Baby I've been here before I've seen this room and I've walked the floor used to live alone before I knew ya But I've seen your flag on the marble arch Our love is not a victory march It's a cold and it's a broken Hallelujah" (Leonard Cohen last stanza) |
||
© Copyright 2008 Sharran WindWalker - All Rights Reserved | |||
Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo WindWalker, This is very good work. Leonard Cohen is way cool. Bobby |
||
Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Sad comentary on life but Bobby's right, this is "way cool and so is Leonard Cohen. Ida |
||
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
A sad song that is sung far too often ~ but you (and Leonard Cohen) have told it well. You wrote it so convincingly, I almost felt as though I was the one dispairingly walking up those rickety stairs with my shoulders slumped... Excellent writing! EA |
||
JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Fine writing...James |
||
Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
WindWalker - felt like I was there while reading this. Nice write... BC |
||
secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
powerfully written! applause!! |
||
LindsayP Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410Australia, Victoria |
Wonderfully written but sad that it's so true, being renacted more times than one could count. A very vivid picture painted in words. You wrote it well Wind Walker. Top accolades for this one. Lindsay |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |