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| How to Join | Member's Area | Private Library | Search | Sanctuary | Login | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Main Forums | Discussion | Tech Talk | Mature Content | Archives |
A home without a wall, |
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| Open Poetry #43 |
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The Plural of Sorry |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida 
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I stepped back scared for what might come I had been waiting for this first time after hoping for an end, the closure I needed to go on What I got instead was a shove back to where I’d been I want to scream unfair All the while grasping for what was and wasn’t A paradox of feeling An ambiguous despair and you, right there Trying to make me explain what even I didn’t fully understand I whimpered fault bleeding responsibility and still you walked away from me I’ll take the figurative slap and turn the other cheek Knowing you are hurt needing me to admit it was my defeat Whispering a thousand apologies in my retreat "too bad ignorance isn't painful" ~Unknown~ |
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| © Copyright 2008 Susan Caldwell - All Rights Reserved | |||
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
"been there, did that"? sigh We really need to stop doing that, huh? *loving hugs* baby I'm tired of explaining myself, too. There's no way to do that and not sound defensive. So critics and social commentators be damned, I say. Love you! With no apologies.  |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
"Whispering a thousand apologies in my retreat" well I personally don't believe you need to apologize for caring about someone even if it isn't returned.  M |
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Bill Charles Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619highways, & byways, for now |
Susan - while reading your heartfelt words I think of where I've been and came back from. Too many memories, but now are in the past. Took a while, but it happened. Wish you well... BC |
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Bridget Shenachie Senior Member
since 2002-01-23
Posts 1056Kansas USA |
I'm such a patsy for the blamers of this world. It's all my fault! And yet somehow that feels a bit arrogant. I'm still not good at sorting out responsibility. Maybe that is because wisdom is in process. Loved your poem. I could identify with your thoughts. Bridget [This message has been edited by Bridget Shenachie (11-07-2008 12:33 PM).] |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
I have had some failed relationships in the past. This one was on me and I will never forgive myself. love to you all. "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
It is most sad to see such a lovely lady have an apparent need to 'pen' so darkly, so often! well written and effectively emotive 'write'! |
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Alison 
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Susan, I believe we grow from every experience. I have been deeply hurt in my past, but it helped form me to become the woman I am today - and I look back at those men and still love them with part of my heart. It's all growth and sharing feelings. That's as profound as I can get tonight. You are a beautiful woman and I thank you for sharing your inner self with us. Alison |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
such torture this thing called Love i feel your pain and echo its stab inside my own punctured heart |
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Artic Wind Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 8080Realm of Supernatural |
I agree with Maureen! ~Chocolate helps everything!  ARCTIC WIND |
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Roniece Dawson-Bruce Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689Sydney, Australia |
sending some of my special RDB hugs your way lovely Susan.. a beautiful gifting here.. love RDB Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight......... |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Thank you all so very much for the wonderful replies. <3 "too bad ignorance isn't painful" |
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Mark Bohannan Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269In the winds of Cherokee song |
Painful thoughts blamed on yourself. Growth is not always easy but usually there are reasons for it. Enjoyed. |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
"I’ll take the figurative slap and turn the other cheek Knowing you are hurt needing me to admit it was my defeat Whispering a thousand apologies in my retreat" loved it all, but these words really stood out in a writing of pure truth...thanks for sharing so eloquently |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
You write very intensely about this pain and feeling of guilt, but the reasons for parting are never to blame only on one. And yes I think it is a lesson. But what is very urgent in my eyes is that you forgive yourself for whatever you think you are to blame for. Don't torture your heart, dear Susan, anymore. Hug it, heal it and open it again. Love and hugs. Margherita  |
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