yellow sling shot with cowboy hat

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Open Poetry #43

yellow sling shot with cowboy hat

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2008-10-02 06:37 AM

I guess it was malibu and metal horses
and those day dreams that night
when you were playing in my mind
and he was grinning at my reaction

I didn't think I would tell you
but writing it down on a paper towel
and putting it in a bud light bottle
with a pretend cork made of napkins

and then just leaving it in front of you
like a neon sigh with loud arrows
and big hands that you said could hurt
if they were ever angry, but you laughed

and let your sandal wiggle on your toes
as you read the words and then blushed
and looked at my eyes with your smile
just partially undone and speechless

as you showed me your fragile tattoo
_________________

daark

Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

1 posted 2008-10-02 09:46 AM

D

There's something special about this poem in the way that it struck me when I read it. And I love how it made me feel.

A

SkaaDee
Member

since 2008-04-07

Posts 116
Canada

2 posted 2008-10-02 10:33 AM

yes

good one.
I like how you paint a scene with an economy of strokes.

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

3 posted 2008-10-02 11:04 AM

Ms ali-san. Thanks little one.

________

Skaadee friendn thanks much.

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

4 posted 2008-10-02 03:30 PM

"like a neon sigh with loud arrows"

great line in an excellent write...enjoyed

The Lady
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-12-26

Posts 7634
The Southwest

5 posted 2008-10-02 03:36 PM

"when you were playing in my mind
and he was grinning at my reaction"

he always grins at your reaction stranger darlin'
and I smile

Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant

since 2000-01-29

Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia

6 posted 2008-10-02 06:52 PM

and looked at my eyes with your smile
just partially undone and speechless

just beautiful Mr Daark... love RDB x

Be kind at heart....for everyone you meet has their own battle to fight.........

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

7 posted 2008-10-03 06:01 AM

steavenr, thanks amigo

________________

lady1, thanks babe for the eyes and smile
_______________

ms r/b, thanks dear one for your touch here

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