The infinitely long ride into things I canâ€™t recall

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Edward Grim
Senior Member

since 2005-12-18

Posts 1154
Greenville, South Carolina

0 posted 2007-08-02 03:45 PM

The infinitely long ride into things I can’t recall

These
tracks set
across sloppy soil that
can’t support
the lunch I ate
last night,
or bear the feet
that belonged to the
ones who had to give it
a start to push from.

That train rolling over
the two thinnest lines
cannot offer a path to
the place it leads.
There isn’t a station
where you think you’re going,
and that stuff ain’t movin’
outside your window;
it’s all just
twitching and shaking
to help you accept that
you’re going nowhere
and getting there
on time.

“Well all the apostles, they’re sittin’ on the swings, sayin’ I’d sell off my savior for a set of new rings.”

[This message has been edited by Edward Grim (08-02-2007 08:54 PM).]

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

1 posted 2007-08-02 05:26 PM

well, amigo I just rode Amtrak from Portland Oregon to central PA,
perhaps...I DID end up nowhere?
and it wasn't even on time! though in the long run, one hour late isn't so horrid

aziza
Member Elite

since 2006-07-09

Posts 2995
Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy!

2 posted 2007-08-03 12:49 PM

Hey Ed,

I am likin' this.

A

bel1e
Senior Member

since 2006-07-24

Posts 1631

3 posted 2007-08-03 09:34 AM

~much enjoyed the traipse thru the moment~

~write-on
~beLLe

TomMark
Member Elite

since 2007-07-27

Posts 2133
LA,CA

4 posted 2007-08-03 04:37 PM

Always cool poems!

Good read

Tomtoo

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

5 posted 2007-08-03 05:31 PM

twitching and shaking
to help you accept that
you’re going nowhere
and getting there
on time.

sometimes that is how "life" is~~

nice writing, Ed

M

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

6 posted 2007-08-03 08:18 PM

"going nowhere and getting there on time"

sweeeeeeeeeeeeeet, EG!!!

I could almost relate, too, but sadly, I am even late for "nowhere".

Have I told you lately I love your work?

Edward Grim
Senior Member

since 2005-12-18

Posts 1154
Greenville, South Carolina

7 posted 2007-08-04 06:49 PM

Thanks everybody.

"Well I wish that you would cheat with someone, 'cause you like diggin' holes in water and we know that can't be done."

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

8 posted 2007-08-07 11:28 AM

you’re going nowhere
and getting there
on time.

Ah, my friend... this feels like my life. *S* Why, then... does that life feel boring... and your write so exciting? *S* Excellent!!

secondhanddreampoet
Member Ascendant

since 2006-11-07

Posts 6394
a 'Universalist' !

9 posted 2007-08-08 06:56 PM

interesting 'write'!

I particularly LOVE the ending!

serious Applause!!

Roysie
Member

since 2007-08-05

Posts 102
Canada

10 posted 2007-08-12 02:47 PM

These
tracks set
across sloppy soil that
can’t support
the lunch I ate
last night,
or bear the feet
that belonged to the
ones who had to give it
a start to push from
Welllllll!!!! Your right about not being a great poet. I've read better grocery lists than this. Awkward and stilted would be too complimentary. I like where you qualify your invitations to critique with "I don't know where you live." However I guess if I wrote like that I'd warn people as well. Have a nice day Eddie, I'm glad you get a kick out of my humble efforts.

Edward Grim
Senior Member

since 2005-12-18

Posts 1154
Greenville, South Carolina

11 posted 2007-08-12 04:04 PM

Rosie Rosie Rosie, you sir, have an attitude problem. It's funny you know, somebody bruises your peachy little ego and you can't stand it. I feel bad for you dude.

quote:
Welllllll!!!! Your right about not being a great poet. I've read better grocery lists than this. Awkward and stilted would be too complimentary.

Hmm, too bad you don't put as much effort into your moronic poems as you do your vengeful replies. You could really make something out of yourself, really, I have faith in you. With a lot of work and maybe a lobotomy you could produce a good poem yet, I know it can happen.

Get some tougher skin Rosie; not everybody likes your Mother Goose style of poetry.

Oh, and you should probably stick to critiquing grocery lists, I think that would utilize your "talents."

"Well I wish that you would cheat with someone, 'cause you're like diggin' holes in water and we know that can't be done."

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.