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Open Poetry #41
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Mistletoe Angel
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since 2000-12-17
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0 posted 2007-12-21 03:21 PM


(Here's what has become a cult classic: a song contemplating how sometimes holiday loneliness can get to so many and make them seem crazy sometimes, and so I let my imagination run wild and came up with this new oddball character, LOL, and how the simplest gift of holiday cheer can melt even the most frozen and erratic of hearts!

Noah Eaton Performs "Ebenezer Caesar (The Misunderstood Freezer Meister") (Click To Listen)

You can hear me perform this loopy classic via the link above! )

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Ebenezer Caesar (The Misunderstood Freezer Meister)
By: Noah Eaton
12/7/05

Ebenezer Caesar,
O, he was quite the caviler,
a burnt offering of mistletoe malaise,
hunts down with a Sharpie marker,
advice from Craig & Jane Hamilton-Parker,
and Anna David columns by the page.
The only Christmas tree he has trimmed,
is one made up of cocktail shrimp,
built from Styrofoam blocks and toothpicks.
To his ears, Ave Maria sounds like logorrhea,
is there a panacea to such preconceived ideas,
what can thaw his heart to Christmas bliss?

O, Ebenezer Caesar,
lives in a fort built from a Frigidaire upright freezer,
If you were his next-door neighbor,
you'd rather spend the holidays with an eyebrow tweezer.
He's as gelid as Stouffer's frozen lasagna,
but deep down I believe he's as sweet as Lebkuchen,
baked by your grandma,
O, meet Ebenezer Caesar,
the misunderstood freezer meister.

Well they say, "When you give to others,
you yourself are blessed."
It's the greatest win-win proposition,
so c'mon, and haul along,
that leftover half moon bay pumpkin bread!
And I know something that tastes just as good served cold,
how about some of my Aunt Polly's sweet potato casserole,
that'll make a whale of a wassail!
Holy Goldilocks,
all this fuzziness is melting your icebox soapbox,
he has a falsetto that slids like an icepick kiss.
Just give him just five minutes longer to deliquesce,
And in no time he'll do the Frankincense Arabesque,
darting like Donner through every province.

O, Ebenezer Caesar,
lives in a fort built from a Frigidaire upright freezer,
If you were his next-door neighbor,
you'd rather spend the holidays with an eyebrow tweezer.
He's as gelid as Stouffer's frozen lasagna,
but deep down I believe he's as sweet as Lebkuchen,
baked by your grandma,
O, meet Ebenezer Caesar,
the misunderstood freezer meister.

O, Ebenezer Caesar,
lived in a fort built from a Frigidaire upright freezer,
Come now, let's be real here,
who you kidding with that eyebrow tweezer?
He was as gelid as Stouffer's frozen lasagna,
but he's as sweet as Lebkuchen,
baked by your grandma,
O, meet Ebenezer Caesar,
the freezer cheermeister,
O' Ebenezer Caesar,
the freezer cheermeister!
.
.
.
"And his disciples remembered that it was written,
the zeal of your house has eaten me up."
Seriously, I'm not kidding,
your Grandma's Lebkuchen is a grace cup,
mmmmmmm mmmmmmm,
tell me,
does she use one egg or two?


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"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other"

Mother Teresa

© Copyright 2007 Nadia Lockheart - All Rights Reserved
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
1 posted 2007-12-21 04:43 PM


Well, my dear Noah, that was one heckuvva ride!
I wish I had even half of your imagination ~ and energy! lol

You just perked me up from my late afternoon energy slump! Thanks!  I needed that! Tra la la la la lala

Merry Christmas, Mistletoe Angel

With love,
EA

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