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Open Poetry #41

Town Known as Hell

smellmyfinger
Junior Member

since 2007-12-02

Posts 21
Wyoming,Natrona

0 posted 2007-12-06 10:15 PM

The fire burning and singing
The people drowning and thinking
Only in this town known as Hell
No single scream or yell

The colors forming shadows
In this place with rotten meadows
Children playing in the dark
In a folded melted park

Paper is spread on the ground
No laughing or crying, no sound
The heat is transforming this town
Into an earthen brown

She smiled and held on
To her five year old child Shawn
He kissed her goodbye
As it dropped from the sky

Only in this town known as Hell

Rosemary J. Gwaltney
Senior Member

since 1999-08-26

Posts 997
northern mountains, Idaho

1 posted 2007-12-09 02:03 PM

Even though I was put off by your name, I knew you must have used it for a reason, and I read your poem.

This is a deeply moving work. This poem deserves serious comment. It is very sad, and I appreciate it for triggering so much emotion in me.

Artic Wind
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 8080
Realm of Supernatural

2 posted 2007-12-09 02:10 PM

SMF-

Very much enjoyed

ARCTIC WIND

Bronzeage
Member

since 2007-07-20

Posts 197

3 posted 2007-12-09 07:27 PM

Welcome to Pip

You have an interesting style and choose some vivid images, though they do not seem to connect.

As for the name, a pseudonym is the writer's perogative,you can be anyone you choose, so a sophmoric joke is as good as any other name. Alway remember, when we choose a name to use in place of the one the post office recognises, we reveal much more than we conceal.

Type II poet. Its worth the work.

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