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Open Poetry #40
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I Thought I Lost you "inspired by Katrina)
| Open Poetry #40 |
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I Thought I Lost you "inspired by Katrina) |
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Jaime Fradera Senior Member
since 2000-11-25
Posts 843Where no tyranny is tolerable |
I thought I lost you. That's how it ended. How did it begin? I was recovering from deep surgery, and had to take pain medication and antibios. Still I was racked by severe waves of vertigo and deafness. You would sometimes tease me as you passed me in the hall, and sometimes I would knock to see if you were home. Then, one night, I fell in love with you, or so I thought. It wasn't the touch of your hand, although it was, It wasn't the sound of your laughter, although it was. Do you know the reason I fell in love with you? Because you wanted me to read to you ... what for? Why would a sighted person want or need to be read to? I told you patiently what I told everyone, about the illness, that I was in the midst of an attack. But you wouldn't leave. I said why didn't you go downstairs and talk with somebody who could hear, because I might be deaf for several weeks. But you insisted we had to talk. And what was that I was writing? You said I did not have to hear you to read to you. I grew very exasperated with you. My head and ears were hurting. I felt awful and needed to lie down again. Finally I read you some of the twaddle I was writing, mostly to amuse myself, it was in Braille. And then I rather heard you vocalizing: O ... Jaime ... Your such a good writer ... It was trash; I threw it away. And that was when the talking began. It went on and on for hour after hour after ... It seemed not to bother you one whit that I could not see or hear you. And it seemed that you weren't even "disabled?" You told me that you were a poet. I was only taking baby steps. I fell in love. My fantasies began to run away with me---- The days and nights we would bury in laughter and talk, the weeks we would spend reading to each other, the months that would bring the magic of deepening friendship. But it was not to be. For you told me of an illness, a problem with blood sugar. and when I held you, You were so thin, so skeletal, it rather scared me. And then Phill Smith had to evict you. It was the rent. I could do nothing; my heart was breaking and breaking ... You were back in the hospital, presumably after a night on the streets. I knew a visceral, wrenching devastation. Who else would want me to read to them? Who else would not care that I was blind and deaf, and love to be with me anyway. I was certain this would never, ever happen again. I raged in an almost inconsolable anguish and grief. I though I lost you ... but, you know what? You merely transformed yourself into my Muse, and I began to write. It was gibberish, turkey twaddle, like every years, each May, I would write you a letter. It was all about how I felt, that I would always love you, how you had morphed into my guardian angel, my inner soul guide, my solace and my dream, how you taught me I had more material than others who were not "disabled." I thought you were gone, yet now I understood that you would never leave me. And you know what happened a few months later? They organized a coffee-house reading and I "volunteered." I read them some "stuff," and you know what? They asked did I have a print copy of that ... So they could run off extra copies at the office for all who wanted one. Now I could see reason in the madness. And much, much later, all that I had given you Midnitesun brought back to me. I bet you had no idea, all those years ago, that you would end up on Piptalk forums, Yet Hereby I do so here enshrine you. Bless you, Karen Wherever you may be; Bless you! Southern Cross |
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Drauntz Member Elite
since 2007-03-16
Posts 2905Los Angeles California |
You may loss a friend but the friendship is always there. it is very nice to have a friend. enjoyed. |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
like every years, each May, I would write you a letter. It was all about how I felt, that I would always love you, how you had morphed into my guardian angel, my inner soul guide, my solace and my dream, ~*~ I can barely see through my tears at the love of this outpouring, Jaime. When we are touched by someone, if only for a moment, and they remain alive in our memories, and in our hearts, then they will live as long as we give them breath. For a person such as you, who has the ability to write, you then offer them immortality. Well done, Sir. This is indeed a Keeper... and one for my private library. Hugging you! " It matters not this distance now " Excerpt, Yesterday's Love |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
~sigh~ mi amigo, I remember this story very well, and how it made me cry. I'm delighted you have written about her, and that she remains your muse of inspiration. Keep writing your life, for you always inspire me. |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
very, very 'real', emotive, 'powerful' and touching 'write'! long sustained applause! |
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