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Teen Poetry #8
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Why do you want to be one of them?
| Teen Poetry #8 |
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Why do you want to be one of them? |
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River Of Tears Junior Member
since 2006-10-28
Posts 25Canada! |
Why do you always have to put on that stupid little act? The one with the bubbly smile, and that giggly laugh - you never used to act like that. Why can’t you just let them see you for what you are? The girl that has always wanted to be herself, and dressed however she wanted. Why can’t you just show them who you really are? The one who didn’t care what anyone thought, and didn’t judge anyone else. Why can’t everybody love you for who you are? The little girl who used to be nice to everyone - what was wrong with that? Why can’t anyone else see the person I see? The girl you used to be, the one that would never forget me. Why cant they just look at you and like what they see? I know they can if they look down far, ‘cause I know what a good friend you are. I see you standing there, laughing at their stupid jokes. Doing anything you must to be part of the crowd. Wearing whatever clothes are in style, trying your best to be one of them. Wearing your hair like the hottest celebrity, coating your face in makeup. What makes you act the way you do? Why do you want to be one of them? ----------------------------------------------- Tell me what you think  I am still a newbie writer... But I love doing it |
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| © Copyright 2006 ShayLee - All Rights Reserved | |||
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MixedChica Junior Member
since 2006-11-10
Posts 34 |
wow good poem. And not like good for a newbie, i wouldn't of guessed if u didn't say that. its really good and i can relate, trust me i have friends like that. The only thing i have to say is maybe re-word this part, I like the idea of it but it kinda kills the flow I see you standing there, laughing at their stupid jokes. Doing anything you must to be part of the crowd. other then that its great. great job |
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pencil&paper Member
since 2006-09-09
Posts 76asleep somewhere in my head |
good poem i can relate i have a friend that's totally like that including the fake laugh, the hair, the make-up, everything. she's a good person and everything but i like her better when she's herself instead of being fake. summary of the rant i just had to type and am as of now not erasing is your poem is easy to relate to and that's a very good thing  "Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music."~Angela Monet |
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hunnie_girl
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
River of Tears. Yes, you are new but your writing has the feeling of someone who has been writing for years(clear confidence)..very good hope to read more... hunnie Better a witty fool than a foolish wit. |
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pen&paper Senior Member
since 2006-06-06
Posts 513 |
I agree with pencil...we have the same friend she's right in front of me...and yet so far away... good write. hope 2 c more from u. |
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River Of Tears Junior Member
since 2006-10-28
Posts 25Canada! |
MixedChica, any ideas on what I could do to fix up that part? And everybody eles Thanks very much! Its very nice to have such great writers(read of few of most of your guys poems.) Again, any ideas on what I could do for the part MixedChica said??? Thanks again |
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River Of Tears Junior Member
since 2006-10-28
Posts 25Canada! |
Does no one else have any tips?? |
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