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Teen Poetry #8

I talked to you today

Shaddow1
Junior Member

since 2006-09-04

Posts 41
Kingman Az, USA

0 posted 2006-09-11 12:19 PM

I talked to you today
You told me you were with her
On my bed I lay
Of our exact relationship I am unsure
I silently cry tears of pain
Reminiscing my memories of you and I
Listening to the steady beat of rain
I can’t seem to wipe my eyes dry
A special bond we now share
One she can never break
A son in which we both care
Still I cry, through my heart you have placed a steak
Without mean you have killed me inside
She miss treats you relentlessly
Yet you continue to stand at her side
I watch you helplessly
Wishing to take her place
Wanting that family we talked about
To wake every morning to your face
But your once felt love for me is in drought
And I feel it will never be as it once was
The dream you spoke of will never be true
You heart won’t feel as mine does
I feel never again will it be me and you

Love is like a Rose; it always dies - Britney Miller

stargal
Senior Member

since 2006-03-06

Posts 1352
OR USA

1 posted 2006-09-11 09:45 AM

It's a sad poem to read, but, I liked the poem. I liked how you are able to express your emotions to the reader in your writings, to me, that is an important aspect to writing poems.

I'm not sure if this poem is talking about you, or just... talking?

Thanks for sharing this wonderful piece, I really enjoyed it

"I pray thee, O God, that I
may be beautiful within."
–Socrates
@-->---

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

2 posted 2006-09-12 12:47 PM

i liked this although at some parts it was a little unclear for me... but keep writing

hunnie*

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your
heart.

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