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Teen Poetry #8
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hate it
| Teen Poetry #8 |
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hate it |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Momentary thoughts, snared before the touch of careless lips, will remain unspoken to the world’s infinite bliss. Afraid to break a moment of amplified silence in a radiant display, we sit. Photographed in our scene of quiet stillness, forever capturing a refusal to speak. Grim determination, demanding respect, for the strength of will to remain silent, when in fact… A heart closed to any signs of retribution deems ebony stillness the perfect solution to an illusion of perfect friendship. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I hate the whole stinkin' poem but bekah was forcing me into writing this piece of junk. Hope your happy cause here is the revision of "silence". "I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars." - Og Mandino @-->--- |
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| © Copyright 2006 stargal - All Rights Reserved | |||
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buttercupbaby Member
since 2006-05-03
Posts 400outside in the rain |
its not your best or w/e[we always say that,huh?im wondering what our best is..]but i still liked it! thank you bekah, for forcing her to post it!=] ~missy |
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rhia_5779 Senior Member
since 2006-06-09
Posts 1334California |
Love the vocab. and imager. this is good. dont hate it. |
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
no no no- i loooooved it!!!! sooo much!! I like the old one and the revised one! and i love how your extensive use of vocabulary is used and just- everything. You never ever ever cease to amaze me with your work. they think it mat not be one of your bests- and maybe its not. but that doesnt mean i like it any less. i like it soooooo much. : ) Thanks so much for posting. i'm happy i made you post it! i knew our protest would work lol love it! bekah |
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
P.s. i'm workin on one right now. i have part done but i havent had ant time to work anything into it...so i'll post it when i get time to finish it. just to repay you for this masterpiece ; ) lol |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
Thanks, everyone is very kind in their replies. Although, your right, the flow is odd, I'm forcing the words on this poem. I'm going through a... odd period where I have no words to write. "I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars." - Og Mandino @-->--- |
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hunnie_girl
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
we told her not to do it you know, we even had a don't change anything protesters haha but still she went behind out back while we were plotting ways on getting her not to change her poem, but maybe we should have looked deeper, because i really thought this was wonderful stargal and thank you for sharing and it took you long enough to post it haha but i liked reading it... hunnie*  A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time for peace ~Ecclesiastes 3:8~ |
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Renegade Junior Member
since 2006-10-21
Posts 22 |
yay great imagery and flows very nice advice? i don't know... lol |
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bekahlekah45 Senior Member
since 2006-03-14
Posts 533 |
more people need to comment beacuse this is good. DUH! |
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