Teen Poetry #8 |
Perfect Destruction |
DancinQueen
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092Kokomo,IN,USA |
Perfect Destruction As you smoke your Marlboros you thumb taps your 5th cup of coffee this morning. The wrinkles around your eyes seen more distinct today. Your hands remind me of my father's, over-worked and over hurt. There are tears in your eyes that refuse to flow; they're trapped behind addiction and the life you pretend to live. You've accepted a false identity; the screw-up, the addict, the no excuses I'm not sorry son, brother, friend and lover. When you smile at me I see the chip in your tooth from another night of careless drinking, but the blue in your eyes is a little brighter and all I want to do is hold your hand. Maybe it's the way you love cherry Starbrusts as much as I do or how you say "shore" instead of "sure" just to get under my skin. It could be how I've never seen you wear white socks or how you always have to be touching me somehow. What I do know is you're my perfect destruction, the skip in my heartbeat, and the "good morning" I want to stick around. I've been MIA for like 5 years ha And I'm not even a teenager anymore, but I thought I'd pop in and post something for old time's sake **You can't always trust the people you want to** |
||
© Copyright 2008 Kiley - All Rights Reserved | |||
hunnie_girl
since 2006-06-18
Posts 2567Canada |
Wow Kiley, I wasnt here when you were in Teen. But i can tell you there is not to many teen members that used to be here. sadly all.. went away. I loved this poem it was so vivid!!!! Glad to have you back hope you drop a line or too back. or maybe I'll just have to go looking around for more of your poems.. I love the red starburts lots too!!! hehe hope to read more soon! Krysti |
||
SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
well I remember you! welcome back! seriously loved this "What I do know is you're my perfect destruction, the skip in my heartbeat, and the "good morning" I want to stick around." especially this part. |
||
Earl Robertson Senior Member
since 2008-01-21
Posts 753BC, Canada |
This was beutiful! "Be Strong and Always Remember what made you you." Earl |
||
hiddensmiles Senior Member
since 2008-02-07
Posts 514at the beach... i wish |
Nice write! |
||
xbrokenxlullabyx Junior Member
since 2007-12-25
Posts 36NJ, U.S.A. |
you're my perfect destruction, the skip in my heartbeat, and the "good morning" I want to stick around. i really really love that bit. also, i like at the begining when you describe him. there are afew awkward lines, but overall it's wonderful. nice job, stay at passions! who cares if you aren't a teen? Susanna V. |
||
Virtual Abyss Member
since 2008-04-09
Posts 52East Coast - USA |
Kiley, Right up my alley! Awesome Awesome Awesome! I see life has moved quite quickly since you've grown up and you obviously have devoted your time to other things. Hopefully soon you will realize you still need "ME" time and you'll come back to what you love. What the heck, you're awesome at it and we all know what it can do for us in our own little ways. I know I'll be here looking for you to pop back up. Good luck and be SAFE! V/r, Virtual Abyss |
||
wisdomofthesword Member
since 2007-12-17
Posts 224the last place on earth |
awesome i love it I don't care if you think I'm a fool but don't ever tell me so |
||
Jaki H Member
since 2008-01-19
Posts 232NJ, USA |
wow! so detailed its like we can see the thing playing out in front of us! and its half-poem half-story... i love it! |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |