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Teen Poetry #8
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Obituary Daydream
| Teen Poetry #8 |
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Obituary Daydream |
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skoolyardturtle Member
since 2005-06-28
Posts 96 |
the air has grown much too warm days where a thought an idea a daydream is not nearly enough to feel you somewhere nearby the park bench had grown uncomfortable from waiting for you to stroll by waiting to meet you on a day that doesn't exist in this world a day where nothing else mattered but you and i days when the rain falls to drown your sorrow and wind blows to kill your tears there's nothing that needs to be said these last few days have been unbareable another miserable week another lonely weekend because i had missed the feeling of knowing you were still there whenever i felt like mustering up the courage to wise up and spend my life with you pretending you were all i needed and nothing else mattered days where it snowed to cover your shame and the frigid air would leave me frozen at the thought of walking alongside her forever the days have grown much too long years where a picture a memory a daydream wasn't nearly enough to know that you were still somehow there this easy chair has become much too uncomfortable while i waited for your return on a day where there was everything else and nothing else mattered but the days..... these days..... these days were growing much too warm and the nights becoming hard to bare but the frigid air...that air so cold and welcoming had left me frozen once more at the thought of walking alongside her forever once more.... once more |
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stargal Senior Member
since 2006-03-06
Posts 1352OR USA |
"the air has grown much too warm days where a thought an idea a daydream is not nearly enough to feel you somewhere nearby the park bench had grown uncomfortable from waiting for you to stroll by waiting to meet you on a day that doesn't exist in this world" This part was amazing, to me! I don't know what to say... I like your writing style, the things you incorporate into your poems. This poem, to me, was very sad but beautiful, beautiful because “you” realize your loss and are willing to admit it… or, that’s what I got from the poem. Thanks for sharing, I look forward to seeing more of your poems!  "I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars." - Og Mandino @-->--- |
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skoolyardturtle Member
since 2005-06-28
Posts 96 |
wow, im just now reading this comment. thanks. i guess what i was trying to write was a small story about a relationship that this "person" in particular had gone through, ending finally with feeling the "cold once more", death. thanks for the feedback. |
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