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Teen Poetry #8

Breathe Through Me!!

RevengeIsMine
Senior Member

since 2006-07-08

Posts 820
Australia

0 posted 2008-01-26 05:15 AM

Breathe Through Me!

Today’s the day
You fall undone
Today’s the day
You scream I’m done

Today’s the day
Your world falls down
Today’s the day
You lose your crown

Today’s the day
You lose your wings
Today’s the day
Your life begins

Today’s the day
You start a fresh
Today’s the day
You do what’s best

Today’s the day
You finally see
Today’s the day
You breathe through me

XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member

since 2008-01-20

Posts 891
Neverland

1 posted 2008-01-26 03:37 PM

beautifully written. it's quick and meaningfull. I'm not sure I understand what it's about but I like it anyway. Good write

FoReVeR.BrOkEn

surf_painter
Member

since 2007-04-10

Posts 434
Canada

2 posted 2008-01-27 09:08 AM

I liked it alot but repeating today's the day every other line I think was a little too much

hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

3 posted 2008-01-28 02:09 AM

Jess hunn one of my fav. poems frum yooh
Krysti

RevengeIsMine
Senior Member

since 2006-07-08

Posts 820
Australia

4 posted 2008-01-28 02:14 AM

Thanks Hunnie.. i'm glad u saw deeper than just whats on the screen but hell u always do lol. thanks again

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