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jayjara
Member

since 2007-05-02

Posts 90
Florida

0 posted 2007-08-20 10:50 PM

Vaga sin dirección
Ataca sin precaución
Vale más que sus amigos
y puede costar su vida

Esconde en las bocas de los mudos
No sabe cuando puede salir de lo oculto
Come el cuerpo de los mentirosos
y vomita la verdad

¡Tener prisa,
no tiene motivo!
¡La destrucción
empieza ahora!

Con la espada de culpa
y las garras del lamento,
causa sufrimiento sin fallecimiento
porque en la hora del fallo es
Dios quien determina su destino.

-J

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

1 posted 2007-08-21 01:53 AM

I lived in Italia per un anno, so I am going to give a try to see if I reconqize anything and it should be practice cause i am going to take spanish in this upcoming school year. I want to try and translat, it tell me what is right and what isn't so I can understand the meaning behind your poem, which sounds lovely by the way, but I also really like the spanish language.

Vaga sin dirección
(Going[the verb] without direction

Ataca sin precaución
(] without precaution
Vale más que sus amigos
(She\He goes[or to go verb] but there are friends
y puede costar su vida
(to be can cost his life

Esconde en las bocas de los mudos
(? in the mouth of the ?
No sabe cuando puede salir de lo oculto
(Don't ? [a form of heart?] can go out of the cult
Come el cuerpo de los mentirosos
how the body of the liars{used translator just for mentiroso because it sounded familiar but couldnt but couldnt place it]
y vomita la verdad
(is vomit green)

¡Tener prisa,
(to have
no tiene motivo!
(doesnt have motive)
¡La destrucción
the destruction
empieza ahora!
(reigns\is emperor again)

Con la espada de culpa
(with the )
y las garras del lamento,
(is the grieving lament)
causa sufrimiento sin fallecimiento
(causes suffering without happyness)
porque en la hora del fallo es
(because in the hour of the fall)
Dios quien determina su destino.
(of the dead 15 will deterimined his destiny)

I could be alll wrong. But i wanted to try and translate it. So let please explain to me what it is about.
I think the title means
the sky green
because in italian sky is cielo
and green is verde, so kind of close.
RhIa

jayjara
Member

since 2007-05-02

Posts 90
Florida

2 posted 2007-08-21 05:30 PM

ok, haha, really no offense but you were way off with the translation..don't worry about it..you'll definitely learn in Spanish class.

And Italian is a lot like Spanish (example: cielo in italian is cielo in spanish which is sky in english) But 1st of all: my title

"La ciega verdad" means= the blind truth.

Vaga sin dirección
[wonders without direction]
Ataca sin precaución
[attacks without warning]
Vale más que sus amigos
[It's worth more then your friends]
y puede costar su vida
[and it could cost your life]

Esconde en las bocas de los mudos
[It hides in the mouths of the mute]
No sabe cuando puede salir de lo oculto
[It doesn't know when it can come out of the darkness]
Come el cuerpo de los mentirosos
[It eats the bodies of the liars]
y vomita la verdad
and vomits the truth]

¡Tener prisa,
[Make haste]
no tiene motivo!
[It has no motive]
¡La destrucción
[The destruction]
empieza ahora!
[Begins now]

Con la espada de culpa
[With the sword of guilt]
y las garras del lamento,
[and the claws of sadness/lament]
causa sufrimiento sin fallecimiento
[it causes suffering w/o mistake/death]
porque en la hora del fallo es Dios quien determina su destino.
[because in the hour of judgment, it is God who determines your destiny]

For those who do not know Spanish, too, well, you are probably wondering why couldn't I just write the same poem in English?..well just read the two poems and notice the different flows and how the one in Spanish has more "umph"

I also challenge you 2 write your own poem in spanish just to experiment, after all, that is what poets do.

Thank you rhia_5779

-J

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

3 posted 2007-08-21 08:53 PM

Is Spanish your native language?

jayjara
Member

since 2007-05-02

Posts 90
Florida

4 posted 2007-08-21 08:58 PM

yes spanish was my 1st language

-J

Balladeer

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-05

Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA

5 posted 2007-08-21 09:02 PM

Interesting....thank you

BrittanyJ
Member

since 2007-06-03

Posts 461
Come find me?

6 posted 2007-08-21 10:56 PM

I like it both in spanish and in english. Although i did have trouble with the spanish at first...lol.

So no more hiding all your pain, you deserve a new start. That's why i'm closing myself away, this is a message from your heart.

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

7 posted 2007-08-22 03:59 PM

wow, I was really off, and yeah your right the spanish has more umph. I think its too hard to write in another language if you aren't fluent in it or know it well enough to think in it. I tried writing in italian awhile ago, sounded ok, but it wasn't great. Cause I understand it but I'm still not fluent and I don't know I just think that because you have to have a good knowledge of the language you are writing in, at least for me. Which is why I will wait till I actually learn spanish before I try writing in it, plus i like your poem way better.

jayjara
Member

since 2007-05-02

Posts 90
Florida

8 posted 2007-08-22 06:32 PM

thank u

-J

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