Open Poetry #44 |
My heart |
Juju Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429In your dreams |
My heart When did I become this way Where I look for parts of me I long lost upon the road On the open dry deserts located within my soul Do I thirst for you Or only for love Its a good thing you don't dance and you're not interested In what would make me happy Otherwise I'd fall for you Again... Juju [This message has been edited by Juju (02-09-2009 08:20 PM).] |
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© Copyright 2009 Juju - All Rights Reserved | |||
2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
Hi Juju, it is quite interesting how we can't manage our feelings as a budget or a work....Your poem express beautifully the hesitation between control and no control...A very enjoyable read. yann |
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gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
"Do I thirst for you Or only for love These lines intrigue me, for they imply a separation between the person and love. But in poetry there is intrigue, and that which is not fully said, but left for the reader to ponder. The word "located" might not be necessary since "within" describes the location. Please forgive the old pedagogue in me! I enjoyed the read. art |
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gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
I should have said: "Meddlesome, old pedagogue." art |
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Suncleaver Member
since 2009-01-18
Posts 481Stafford England |
I loved this poem. When we lose parts of ourselves along the winding road so far in the distance we cannot remember what we've lost, only feel it's void left inside us. It's then that we search for new things to fill those voids and love is often the quickest solution. But be wary that it doesn't become another piece of you shed like old skin out of memory on the long winding road. Take heart, one day you'll find someone who does dance and is very interested in making you happy. Never sigh for a better world, it's already composed, played and told. |
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo dear Juju, Go find someone new. There's loads out there. Go find those missing parts, they're out there too. Love Bobby |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
Juju, if you happen to find a right ventricle, or a crushed aorta, let me know, they could be mine. I'll probably need them, when I fall all over again as well. Nice stuff dear poet! |
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