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critical mass
Member

since 2009-03-25

Posts 275
Michigan

0 posted 2009-03-26 11:15 PM

She looked more like a boy to me
with sideburns and not curls,
a rusted plate read "Iron Nell",
this bridge we kids called Nellie.

She wasn't near as long as most
nor elegant as some,
but that's OK, we didn't know
of such things in those summers.

Our town grew up beneath her arch
as tall as barn or silo.
Three generations scaled her heights
then rock-smacked on her waters.

She was the hub of summers spin
most stories give her mention,
the laughter and the heartache
heaped like children on her girders.

A vivid space of memories
now occupies her place
and barefoot ghosts can still be heard
where Nellie babysat us.

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2009-03-26 11:19 PM

makes me think of places of my remembered summers...

I liked how you painted the bridge for us to see

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean

since 2002-08-27

Posts 40215
Realms of Light

2 posted 2009-03-27 11:46 AM

Enjoyed reading of your vivid summer memories.
This poem brought back a few of my own.

"barefoot ghosts can still be heard"
~ loved that line!

Giving you a warm, welcoming pip hug,

Earth Angel

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

3 posted 2009-03-27 11:57 AM

I love the "barefoot ghosts" line as well, critical mass. The entire poem is excellent.
Ida

critical mass
Member

since 2009-03-25

Posts 275
Michigan

4 posted 2009-03-27 07:04 PM

SEA
Earth Angel
Marchmadness
Thanks for your replies. This is around the fifth re-write of this poem.

Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

5 posted 2009-03-29 02:44 AM

I liked learning about Nellie and sharing a part of your memories. I am enjoying your poetry. It's interesting.

Alison

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

6 posted 2009-03-29 03:48 AM

Hi CM, a very enjoyable read, delightful to share your summer memories, it looks pretty nice and vivid and I love the atmosphere.

have a nice day

yann

critical mass
Member

since 2009-03-25

Posts 275
Michigan

7 posted 2009-03-29 06:39 AM

Alison

2islander2

Thanks for your replies.

This is actuallly a poem within a short story I wrote. I had a lot of fun with this.

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