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Huan Yi
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Huan Yi |
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Cute Aquarius
Unregistered
New MemberPosts 4 |
Thank you for your reply to Ron. What you said is very true. No one deserves to be used while we wait around for the perfect guy/girl. Sometimes it can be difficult to realize you are doing this because all the meanwhile everyone is asking when are you getting married? when are you moving in? There is so much social pressure for us to do certain things at certain times in our lives. You're right, I am being an absolute bitch by doing this to him. I will just do him the favour and let him move on with his life because I know he will find someone who will not have these doubts. |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
don't let him rattle your cage like that...what the hell makes him an expert?! You have to do what is best for you in this situation. He sounded to me like a bitter pissed off man, not like someone who was looking at the situation objectively. I have been in your shoes. I understand completely what you are saying. I don't think you are a bitch, I think you are considering your boyfriends feelings here as well as your own. And you are right, the people close to you don't see it the way you do, they don't live it so they don't know "what's wrong". Just because you dated him for 2 plus years does not mean you are obligated (nor is he) to get married or to move in together. Other people cannot and should not direct your life. This is something you need to work out with your boyfriend, and from what it sounds like to me, this will be good for the both of you  Good luck... |
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Huan Yi Member Ascendant
since 2004-10-12
Posts 6688Waukegan |
Thank You. Take care. John |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
I believe in gentle ways you two should be communicating this to each other. Our world teaches us about romantic love, two joining and becoming one, but says nothing about the after effects of such...the need for compatibility, mature understanding, giving as well as taking and allowing. Love is not controlling, but listening with open heart and mind...true love weathers hard times, it doesn't run away, and cares for the sacredness of another...in sickness and in health....true love is not a license for irresponsiblity, impolite digs or acting out like spoiled children b/c he/she doesn't totally agree...love is allowance, supportive and encouragement...it is not jealous nor does it run from person to person b/c something didn't work out with the last person. Love is loving oneself that they are willing to self examine...realizing the signficance for another to be successful, enlist in hobbies, giving another their space. Love is not about sex, but making love even when two people are not in bed...making love 24 hours a day....to each other and it doesn't expect but marvels when the other half wants to do something different and experience life...love is realizing you have choice, and nurtures the ideas of another, most people don't know how to care for love after they've earned it...I've known some very successful marriages in which there is compatibility, and willingness to try something new. Love is experiencing new ideas together, sharing thoughts, communications, and being mature enough to not take dissatisfactions and differences as a personal attack against ones character. Love is hard times....sometimes...in which two people grow closer with the revolution of change...Mature understanding and awareness to not point fingers and blame, but caress and understand the significance of each others need to grow |
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LeeJ Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296 |
adding one more thing bring nothing contaminated into a relationship |
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