Open Poetry #17 |
Dear Honey,,,, Poet DeVine's Challenge |
Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Dear honey...well, it's been a while Since I took pen in hand. I've meant to write you sooner - Sometimes things don't go as planned. There always seems so much to do With work and school and such. Please know that I am missing you And love you very much. The job? Oh, it's about the same. Not too much I can say. Each day is like the one before Without a raise in pay. The flowers that we planted new, Last spring, if I recall Have blossomed out quite beautifully Against the garden wall. The neighbors ask if you're ok. Sometimes they turn away When I say that you're fine and you'll Be home soon any day. The boys have been a real help. They pitch in with the chores Though Jimmy's only nine years old And Mikey just turned four. But Mikey takes the garbage out While Jimmy cuts the lawn And, late at night, when tucked in bed They ask me where you've gone. I tell them that you're searching for That thing you have to find To give your life importance and Relieve your troubled mind. Then, once you find it, you'll return And, once again, we'll be What we had been before you left.. A real family. Well, look at me, I'm rambling on And here it's almost two. Just want to tell you we are fine And really missing you. I don't know where to send this 'cause I'm not sure where you are But that's ok. You love us and You can't be very far. I'll put it with the others Piled high on the kitchen shelf. When you come back you'll have the time To read them for yourself. Well, honey, not much more to say. Be nice to feel your touch. The boys and I are waiting here. We love you very much. |
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© Copyright 2001 Michael Mack - All Rights Reserved | |||
Startime Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918Canada |
Oh shoot, Balladeer, did you have to make me cry so much. This is so very real in this world we live in. *sigh* I know...I have raised two daughters without fathers. Powerful and very moving. **big hugs** thank you, so much, for sharing it. Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams. |
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Enchantress Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113Canada eh. |
Dang you Balladeer! Making me all misty eyed after the things I just posted about you in Larry's roast! This is soooo good! ~Hugs, Nancy~ *~ Wishing everyone a New Year filled with Peace & Love ~* |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
making me cry is not fair.... I love this |
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Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612Hurricane Alley |
I couldn't see the last verse through the tears in my eyes. This has got to be the saddest love letter ever! Challenge truly well met! And into the library. |
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LadyShadowWalker Junior Member
since 2001-12-27
Posts 15Minnesota, USA |
Very nice work. Very sad and heart felt. The added rhymes are a nice touch. :-) --Lady where rabbits and deer play, where hearts run free, that is where I am. Second star to the right and straight on 'till morning...... |
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Tracey Member Elite
since 2001-08-29
Posts 2808where insanity meets breeding |
Wow, you really know how to bring a lump to a girls throat don’t you? This one is full of emotion, I could just feel the writer trying to fool himself that she’s coming back. You got me with this one Michael. If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please? |
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Elizabeth Santos Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269Pennsylvania |
Your verses are terrific and prolific May you continue to offer us such wonderfully touching stories of life You are the best Liz PS (Forget about that roast!) |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
I'm sure I look quite silly right now, staring at the computer screen with tears streaming down my face... "I'll put it with the others Piled high on the kitchen shelf. When you come back you'll have the time To read them for yourself." That stanza is where I lost it. This is simply beautiful, Balla... so sad, and beautiful. But I'm not going to forgive you for making me cry! --Marie "It's been a long December, and there's reason to believe that maybe this year will be better than the last." (Counting Crows) [This message has been edited by Fading Away (12-29-2001 01:26 PM).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
She must have been kidnapped... no one can not love a poet, right Classic Balladeer poetry... we can learn so much reading you... you da man!! later-wheres-the kleenex-gator lol jm When your own emptiness is all thats getting through |
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Mistletoe Angel
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816Portland, Oregon |
(big hugggsssssss) Oh Michael, this is so sos ad, my heart cries out to all these families who have to cope with seperation. (sad sigh) I hope this isn't related to your real life and your dear love can always see you between the schedules. (sigh) So sad but beautiful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Balladeer, thank you for sharing! May love and light always shine upon you! Love, Noah Eaton |
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Saunni Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777West Virginia |
Oh, so very sad and yes she will return because how can she not? She is missing out on so much. Great write here. Sad but so well written. Best of luck to you. Sauni @~~~>~~ |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Oh you do have a way of bringing tears out. Such a heartfelt letter, the one who inspired it is a blazing fool if she is really gone. Sandra |
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SmartChick Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081On A Journey To The Unknown |
Oh Balladeer! This is so sad. It brought tears to my eyes. I don't know why anyone would leave such a charming man as you are. I wish for you the very best. |
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rosepetals25
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076PA |
Balladeer It seems you have broken all our hearts to a degree with this poem.. I should have brought my tissue box to pass around. This is so well written.. you definately know how to tug at heart strings as well as funny bones. It's wonderful. Hugs, Tara "My heart is like an open book, for the whole world to read" |
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Charisma
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906lost in blue pages |
well....glad I had the tissue box near me. thanks for sharing this keeper. ((hugs)) Charisma ~*Theresia~* |
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BloomingRose Member Elite
since 2000-08-09
Posts 3092Florida |
I am with the rest of the group. This is one that pulls at the heart and brings on the tears... Hugs, Deb |
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Kethry Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082Victoria Australia |
Dear Michael, give a girl a moment's grace to wipe the tears from her face then you go and start anew making me cry is what you do. A tear jerker, a strong storyline and a talent that should be published. Kethry Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Balladeer, Well done but I don't believe it. Wait till LJA reads it. LOL |
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Ivy Rose Senior Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 1300MA, USA |
THIS IS INCREDIBLE!!!! What a heart you must have. To love someone so much that you would forgive her anything. This poem touched me deeply. *****Ivy Rose |
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C? Member
since 2001-12-29
Posts 190 |
brilliant in its progressiveness!! reads like a painting! |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
Startime..yes, it is sadly too real in today's world. I commend you on what you did alone and I will always wish you the best!! Enchantress...Does that mean the guillotine is on hold? God, I hope so!! SEA..All's fair in love and war...and I'm not at war with ya? DeVine One...thank you! I'm honored to be there.... Lady...I thank you for reading and enjoying :0) Tracey..thank you for the lump...and for letting me get to you. That's a real compliment... Liz....what roast? I didn't see any roast!! Thank you, kind lady... Marie..I don't think anything could ever make you look silly! Thank you so much for your words....and for not forgiving me. Janet Marie...yes, everyone loves a poet....but sometimes from afar! Such is life. Thank you, spammy lady.. Noah...well, I'm not positive what my dear love seeing me between the schedules means....but it sounds inviting!! Thank you, kind sir! Saunni..fortunately it's only fiction. I'm very glad you enjoyed... catalinamoon...not me, happily, but I've seen it happen. Thank you, Sandra... SmartChick...I don't know, either. I'll ask them if I can ever find them!! Thank you, my friend, and best wishes to you, also...:0) Tara...thank you! Unfortunately sometimes my aim is off. I'm tugging at a heartstring and I hit a funnybone! Makes for interesting dates *wink* Charisma...thanks for keeping me!! Blooming Rose...thank you for letting the poem touch you.. Kethry...thank you for such wonderful words. Now go have a beer....and a bean! Sy...yep, I was thinking the same thing..Flak jacket is on... Ivy Rose...thank you, dear lady. Love can do that for some... C?...a wonderful description...I thank you for reading.. |
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Magnus
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135South Carolina, USA |
I'm havin' to do this two times...cause I hit the wrong durn key... Michael...why do you have to give us such a touching poem...that makes this old man's eyes misty.... Nicely done... |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Balladeer, Wow! If you won't cry, I won't either (it's a guy thing)! |
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Madame Chipmunk Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296Michigan |
Balladeer, this is the saddest love letter I have EVER read.....not that I've read all that many....but this is the saddest I could ever even imagine. I am so glad to know that its fictional. Great work. copyright2001 Lyra Nesius |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Kleenix alert, kleenix alert! Very sad Michael but oh so good! ~*~ Happy New Year |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
'Deer, this is so touching. Why do you have to reduce the ladies here to tears? Especially when your shoulder isn't here to cry on. Dee I wish you every happiness and may you always have the best of the good things in life. a brand |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
As always, I waited to find the wonderful twist you would weave into this piece Michael, and you never cease to amaze me dear poet. What a heartwarming and moving piece. I could not help but be inspired to respond ... /pip/Forum52/HTML/003129.html Best wishes and big hugs, /Kit |
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Once again, you pen right to the heart of the matter... well done, 'Deer...well done! |
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Hypnosis Member
since 2001-12-02
Posts 325CO |
What a sweet poem. I hope your love comes back to you. This is a nice write, as always. Your writing always seems to hook me and reel me in. Randy Meador a life lived unexplored is a life not worth living. |
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Ariana Senior Member
since 2000-10-08
Posts 571Orlando, Florida |
Michael - you certainly can bring out the tears in everyone. Truly, this writing is exceptional and definitely goes in a safe place to keep. Thank you for being such a good writer!!!! |
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strbbux Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859 |
Oh I love your style. It is very much similar to how I write. Very much like just talking to someone, very relaxed. great poem, floria |
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Marsha
since 2000-07-10
Posts 7423Maidstone Kent England |
'Deer dear heart Well look what you did, I hope you're happy I've just broken my New Years resolution, and it's only 4 hours old. I promised myself no more tears. I wouldn't mind if tears suited me but they don't I suppose you know this is outstanding and superior and all the other superlatives as well. of course you do. And if you don't then you've not been paying attention, for as I've said at least several times YOU really are the master poet. Truly wonderful, I shall now go and dry out, I need some heat to blow dry me. And everyone if you have a wonky connection on your screen and you get an electric shock it's not my fault. Everyone knows that electricity and water don't mix. I didn't leave a damp patch here on purpose, blame 'Deer, he made me cry. Again As always Mushy To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace St John ch2 v1 |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
well, I haven't been around that much and haven't read you bal... and probably won't not ever again cause you sure can make it rain. I just hope this is your great creative writing talent and not true. In any case a great piece Bal, now where's my kleenix oh I mean umberalla.. parker |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
I love your stories...even when they're sad. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Yes many of us can relate to this on some level...I know I can...James |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
Balladeer, Okay, I've collected them all. I suppose they won't be together for long...but here it goes. Thanks so much for this love tale! |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
Absent through the holidays Existing in a cardboard maze, I have missed your poetry... This great one really touches me. *S* |
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